Thursday, April 28, 2011

Ajax's Fanservice Five

Hello again Gentelmen, Lesbians and *Gasp* Is that a straight girl I see?

No? No. Damn.

Well, Seeing as I am the only member who doesn’t either A) have a wife/girlfriend, so has never wanted another girl sexually in the history of his life, Or, B) A stick up his arse the size of Texas, It falls to me to give Y’all the lowdown on the babes of this season.

That’s right fellas, it’s the:

Fanservice 5. MK2

Right, dropping in at number 5, is Mae St. Clair. I know a few of you might be in disagreement here, given her rather thin, athletic figure. And the B-Cup associated with it. However, she – as her (Sadly short lived, fuck you Shawn and Zach) Geisha costume showed – knows how to accentuate it perfectly.

Pros: Ballerina, so flexible She’s also very rich and pretty dominant, so if you like Fem-Dom, she’s your girl.

Cons: At the centre of a goddamn Love Triangle, also, incredibly cold. Like, if you fucked her, you’d probably get frostbite cold. Also, probably a holder of her V-card.

Stepping up to the deck at 4th place, is Jeanette Buendia. She is another of the smaller competitors, filling up another B-Cup. You know, I’d think that one of the producers had a smalltit fetish, but, well, its more than counteracted. Also, in a side note, her face is so cute! I almost went weeaboo there and did the thing with the K, a, w and a buttload of I’s. Its that cute.

Pros: Unlike our above contender, has plenty of experience. Also, she was quite good with that little stripdance into a hula girl costume. Has she had more… Professional training? Ahh, I kid y’all again, but it was damn hot.

Cons: Is probably completely insane. I mean, who does a stripdance, for the camerals, on national television, then sunbathes? ON AN ISLAND FULL OF MURDERERS? Girls got a screw loose. Not that I’m complaining.

Coming down to scoop the bronze is none other than Eloise Winterburn, who has the nicest D-Cups I’ve seen in a while, and has a very high class look. Trust me, I know how the upper classes look, and she is bang on that. I’ve gotta say, I love it.

Pros: BISEXUAL *Ahem* Sorry ‘bout that, but if you get her and No.2 in a room and take pictures, I would love you forever. Also, as with all the SDA students, More money than sense.
Cons: That scowl. I’m sorry, but a cute smile just makes a girl for me, and she just refuses to do it.

Second place goes to Amber Lyons. If you need to ask why, you are probably either a girl, or a gay guy. Or blind. She’s another pint sized pretty, her pert little body-

Sorry, slipped into Fanfic mode there. And… Yup, thats yet another FBI watchlist for me! Yaaaaaay!

Pros: BISEX- Oh, wait, I already did that gag, didn’t I? Shoot. I’m sorry, but that video is amazing.

Cons: … Um… No.

Finnaly, swooping in to take Pirate gold is Ms. Panya. Arguably this is predictable, but really? Can you blame me? This is the girl walking around in a furry costume! (Not a fan of Smokey myself, more of a Nekomimi fan personally, but I’ll take it where I can)

Cannot… Comprehend… Hotness…

Pros: Launcher of a thousand ships. With good reason.

Cons: Apart from being rather firmly in the “Out of my league” department, none.

Honourable mentions to… Just about every girl. Seriously.

So, let me know who your top 5 are (Guys and gals) in the comments!

1 comment:

  1. It does seem that there are an astounding number of photogenic students selected for the show. Do you suppose that is a part of the selection criteria to at least some degree?