WESTERN BEACH:
The large group of April Stone, Jhamel Thompson, Jeanette Buendia, Eloise Winterburn and Brenda Hernandez settle on another beach. Jhamel breaks down upset which leads to an awkward group hug. He starts shooting to protect the group after Zachariah Johnston throws a wrench at his head. This momentarily scares the group, April Stone is particularly effected and wanders off the next day. Poor girl.
Star of the Scene: I'm really starting to love Jhamel Thompson. It seems underneath that gang persona the kid has a heart, but is still tough enough to protect the group he's in and shoot.
COASTAL LAKE:
Well there was a sex scene which got interupted by Jared Clayton which was quite funny. Then someone dies, but Nery will talk about that later. It seems like Zachariah Johnson is everywhere as here he is again watching Amber Lyons swim naked. Then he follows her and Sterling Odair somewhere. This is truly setting up something or the editors wouldn't all of a sudden cut from naked swimming Amber with the majestic music to Zach hiding nearby and watching with creepy music playing.
After they left Vincent Sullivan showed up and read a book? Not sure what will happen with that.
Star of the Scene: Amber Lyons for being an inexplicable yet accidental camera whore! Sex scene, topless fighting, then naked swimming. Yesh. One for the guys I guess.
Showing posts with label Eloise Winterburn. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Eloise Winterburn. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Ajax's Fanservice Five
Hello again Gentelmen, Lesbians and *Gasp* Is that a straight girl I see?
No? No. Damn.
Well, Seeing as I am the only member who doesn’t either A) have a wife/girlfriend, so has never wanted another girl sexually in the history of his life, Or, B) A stick up his arse the size of Texas, It falls to me to give Y’all the lowdown on the babes of this season.
That’s right fellas, it’s the:
Fanservice 5. MK2
Right, dropping in at number 5, is Mae St. Clair. I know a few of you might be in disagreement here, given her rather thin, athletic figure. And the B-Cup associated with it. However, she – as her (Sadly short lived, fuck you Shawn and Zach) Geisha costume showed – knows how to accentuate it perfectly.
Pros: Ballerina, so flexible She’s also very rich and pretty dominant, so if you like Fem-Dom, she’s your girl.
Cons: At the centre of a goddamn Love Triangle, also, incredibly cold. Like, if you fucked her, you’d probably get frostbite cold. Also, probably a holder of her V-card.
Stepping up to the deck at 4th place, is Jeanette Buendia. She is another of the smaller competitors, filling up another B-Cup. You know, I’d think that one of the producers had a smalltit fetish, but, well, its more than counteracted. Also, in a side note, her face is so cute! I almost went weeaboo there and did the thing with the K, a, w and a buttload of I’s. Its that cute.
Pros: Unlike our above contender, has plenty of experience. Also, she was quite good with that little stripdance into a hula girl costume. Has she had more… Professional training? Ahh, I kid y’all again, but it was damn hot.
Cons: Is probably completely insane. I mean, who does a stripdance, for the camerals, on national television, then sunbathes? ON AN ISLAND FULL OF MURDERERS? Girls got a screw loose. Not that I’m complaining.
Coming down to scoop the bronze is none other than Eloise Winterburn, who has the nicest D-Cups I’ve seen in a while, and has a very high class look. Trust me, I know how the upper classes look, and she is bang on that. I’ve gotta say, I love it.
Pros: BISEXUAL *Ahem* Sorry ‘bout that, but if you get her and No.2 in a room and take pictures, I would love you forever. Also, as with all the SDA students, More money than sense.
Cons: That scowl. I’m sorry, but a cute smile just makes a girl for me, and she just refuses to do it.
Second place goes to Amber Lyons. If you need to ask why, you are probably either a girl, or a gay guy. Or blind. She’s another pint sized pretty, her pert little body-
Sorry, slipped into Fanfic mode there. And… Yup, thats yet another FBI watchlist for me! Yaaaaaay!
Pros: BISEX- Oh, wait, I already did that gag, didn’t I? Shoot. I’m sorry, but that video is amazing.
Cons: … Um… No.
Finnaly, swooping in to take Pirate gold is Ms. Panya. Arguably this is predictable, but really? Can you blame me? This is the girl walking around in a furry costume! (Not a fan of Smokey myself, more of a Nekomimi fan personally, but I’ll take it where I can)
Cannot… Comprehend… Hotness…
Pros: Launcher of a thousand ships. With good reason.
Cons: Apart from being rather firmly in the “Out of my league” department, none.
Honourable mentions to… Just about every girl. Seriously.
So, let me know who your top 5 are (Guys and gals) in the comments!
No? No. Damn.
Well, Seeing as I am the only member who doesn’t either A) have a wife/girlfriend, so has never wanted another girl sexually in the history of his life, Or, B) A stick up his arse the size of Texas, It falls to me to give Y’all the lowdown on the babes of this season.
That’s right fellas, it’s the:
Fanservice 5. MK2
Right, dropping in at number 5, is Mae St. Clair. I know a few of you might be in disagreement here, given her rather thin, athletic figure. And the B-Cup associated with it. However, she – as her (Sadly short lived, fuck you Shawn and Zach) Geisha costume showed – knows how to accentuate it perfectly.
Pros: Ballerina, so flexible She’s also very rich and pretty dominant, so if you like Fem-Dom, she’s your girl.
Cons: At the centre of a goddamn Love Triangle, also, incredibly cold. Like, if you fucked her, you’d probably get frostbite cold. Also, probably a holder of her V-card.
Stepping up to the deck at 4th place, is Jeanette Buendia. She is another of the smaller competitors, filling up another B-Cup. You know, I’d think that one of the producers had a smalltit fetish, but, well, its more than counteracted. Also, in a side note, her face is so cute! I almost went weeaboo there and did the thing with the K, a, w and a buttload of I’s. Its that cute.
Pros: Unlike our above contender, has plenty of experience. Also, she was quite good with that little stripdance into a hula girl costume. Has she had more… Professional training? Ahh, I kid y’all again, but it was damn hot.
Cons: Is probably completely insane. I mean, who does a stripdance, for the camerals, on national television, then sunbathes? ON AN ISLAND FULL OF MURDERERS? Girls got a screw loose. Not that I’m complaining.
Coming down to scoop the bronze is none other than Eloise Winterburn, who has the nicest D-Cups I’ve seen in a while, and has a very high class look. Trust me, I know how the upper classes look, and she is bang on that. I’ve gotta say, I love it.
Pros: BISEXUAL *Ahem* Sorry ‘bout that, but if you get her and No.2 in a room and take pictures, I would love you forever. Also, as with all the SDA students, More money than sense.
Cons: That scowl. I’m sorry, but a cute smile just makes a girl for me, and she just refuses to do it.
Second place goes to Amber Lyons. If you need to ask why, you are probably either a girl, or a gay guy. Or blind. She’s another pint sized pretty, her pert little body-
Sorry, slipped into Fanfic mode there. And… Yup, thats yet another FBI watchlist for me! Yaaaaaay!
Pros: BISEX- Oh, wait, I already did that gag, didn’t I? Shoot. I’m sorry, but that video is amazing.
Cons: … Um… No.
Finnaly, swooping in to take Pirate gold is Ms. Panya. Arguably this is predictable, but really? Can you blame me? This is the girl walking around in a furry costume! (Not a fan of Smokey myself, more of a Nekomimi fan personally, but I’ll take it where I can)
Cannot… Comprehend… Hotness…
Pros: Launcher of a thousand ships. With good reason.
Cons: Apart from being rather firmly in the “Out of my league” department, none.
Honourable mentions to… Just about every girl. Seriously.
So, let me know who your top 5 are (Guys and gals) in the comments!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Brown Team Analysis by The Super Genius MadMax
When Snowball started up this blog, it was obvious- to me at least- that eventually he’d have to call in the one true online expert on SotF TV. (No, I don’t mean that MarWIN guy. He lost all credibility when he sold out to the corporate whores and got put in as a mentor)
Until this season starts, I’ll be rating teams, individually and as a whole, on a scale of 0 to 5 stars for various factors. Then, when my check from the other blog clears, I’ll move my famed ROTC feature over to here, so that like the old blog, MadMax can once again carry you all to success.
So, the first team I chose is my new favourite for “easy out” this season, Team Turd! (Or, Brown Team if you’re being official-like):
Mentor: Aiko Yoshida
Brown Team’s mentor this season is some annoying, cheery punk reporter bitch, who wears more belts than a final fantasy character. No much more I can say here aside from that. She’s probably just there for eye-candy and fan-fiction shipping possibilities.
Usefulness to Team: * (1) – Seriously, how much good is a /reporter/ gonna do?
Eye-Candy Factor: **** (4) – Come on, they’re pandering to a demographic here.
Likeliness to go Crazy: ** (2) – Unless she already is.
Likeliness to get shipped: ***** (5) – I’m surprised there aren’t already like 40 fanfics out there.
BROWN 01: Nick Simmons
Grunge-looking alcoholic choir singer from Detroit. Apparently clumsy as, so I have no idea. Easy out written all over him, if Johnny from Season 7 was any indication.
Weapon: POWER DRILL *** (3)
School: Detroit Central High
Usefulness to Team: *** (3) – He’d rank higher if he could walk in a straight line
Eye-Candy Factor: -***** (MINUS 5) – Dude. No. Go take a shower.
Likeliness to go Crazy: **** (4) – Johnny from Season 7 all over again.
Likeliness to get shipped: ** (2) – God I hope not.
BROWN 02: April ~Elise~ Stone
Poor little rich bitch. Short, vegan hipster with a weak stomach and far too many records (Keep an eye out for the auction when she gets killed). Her brother Marcus owes me $5. No jokes. Probably going to run off with her biffles.
Weapon: Rubber Band Launching Pen ***** (5) – I want one.
School: Silver Dragon Chinese Restaurant
Usefulness to Team: ** ½ (2 1/2) – She’ll probably get stepped on.
Eye-Candy Factor: ** ½ (2 ½) – Average at best. Loses points for wearing more layers than the average pass the parcel present
Likeliness to go Crazy: ***** (5) – More “oooh, pretty colors!” than “princess stabbity” with her weapon.
Likeliness to get shipped: *** (3) – Most likely in H/C fics with Brenda Hernandez.
BROWN 03: Eloise Winterburn (What an Ice-burn of a name)
Vain bitch with an ironic interest in the “retro”. Probably a closet hipster. Scowl that could kill most animals and small children under the age of three. Also probably manipulating half of her team before she gets a rubber band in the eye and freaks.
Weapon: Sledgehammer *** (3) – If she can lift the thing without breaking a nail.
School: Detroit Central (Probably a typo, she belongs at SDCR)
Usefulness to Team: ** (2) – She’ll be too busy manipulating them
Eye-Candy Factor: **** (4) – Actually pretty hot when she’s not looking like a bulldog.
Likeliness to go Crazy: **** ½ (4 ½) – Likely to freak out at her team when she finds out they’re too dumb to be manipulated.
Likeliness to get shipped: ** (2) – The new go to if you need a bitch to get beaten down in your fic. Calling it.
BROWN 04: Marion Clayton
Into “privacy”. Piano player which usually means “bitch” if Jessica/Marie/Cerise from seasons 8/9/10 were any example. Into music in general, so expect cheap plugs from her and April discussing music. Most likely on the team to die horribly.
Weapon: Nodachi * (1) – Bigger sword than Sephiroth’s.
School: Silver Dragon Chinese Take-Out
Usefulness to Team: ** (2) – Will insist on carrying her sword around, making her pretty useless.
Eye-Candy Factor: *** (3) – Though she needs to eat a sammich and not dress like she’s permanently at a dinner date.
Likeliness to go Crazy: **** (3) – The quiet reserved types always do.
Likeliness to get shipped: ** (2) – Just not feeling it. She’s gonna get a few and then fizzle out like Joel from Season 6.
BROWN 05: Brenda Hernandez
Mexican kickboxer. Could only be more of a stereotype if she wore a sombrero and ate nachos. Betting she’s getting deported if she wins. Still probably the only competent member of the team, and probably the new face of SotF-TV H/C fics. Roman catholic, too. Got the best weapon of the version.
Weapon: NERF GUN. ***** (5) – Suh-weet.
School: Detroit Central.
Usefulness to Team: **** (4) – No hablo ingles.
Eye-Candy Factor: *** ½ (3 ½) – Muscles don’t do it for me, but there’s /probably/ a market out there.
Likeliness to go Crazy: * (1) – Seems pretty level headed, actually.
Likeliness to get shipped: *** (3) – Most likely in H/C fics with EVERYONE.
OVERALL TEAM RATING: ** (2) – Pretty much boned.
Until this season starts, I’ll be rating teams, individually and as a whole, on a scale of 0 to 5 stars for various factors. Then, when my check from the other blog clears, I’ll move my famed ROTC feature over to here, so that like the old blog, MadMax can once again carry you all to success.
So, the first team I chose is my new favourite for “easy out” this season, Team Turd! (Or, Brown Team if you’re being official-like):
Mentor: Aiko Yoshida
Brown Team’s mentor this season is some annoying, cheery punk reporter bitch, who wears more belts than a final fantasy character. No much more I can say here aside from that. She’s probably just there for eye-candy and fan-fiction shipping possibilities.
Usefulness to Team: * (1) – Seriously, how much good is a /reporter/ gonna do?
Eye-Candy Factor: **** (4) – Come on, they’re pandering to a demographic here.
Likeliness to go Crazy: ** (2) – Unless she already is.
Likeliness to get shipped: ***** (5) – I’m surprised there aren’t already like 40 fanfics out there.
BROWN 01: Nick Simmons
Grunge-looking alcoholic choir singer from Detroit. Apparently clumsy as, so I have no idea. Easy out written all over him, if Johnny from Season 7 was any indication.
Weapon: POWER DRILL *** (3)
School: Detroit Central High
Usefulness to Team: *** (3) – He’d rank higher if he could walk in a straight line
Eye-Candy Factor: -***** (MINUS 5) – Dude. No. Go take a shower.
Likeliness to go Crazy: **** (4) – Johnny from Season 7 all over again.
Likeliness to get shipped: ** (2) – God I hope not.
BROWN 02: April ~Elise~ Stone
Poor little rich bitch. Short, vegan hipster with a weak stomach and far too many records (Keep an eye out for the auction when she gets killed). Her brother Marcus owes me $5. No jokes. Probably going to run off with her biffles.
Weapon: Rubber Band Launching Pen ***** (5) – I want one.
School: Silver Dragon Chinese Restaurant
Usefulness to Team: ** ½ (2 1/2) – She’ll probably get stepped on.
Eye-Candy Factor: ** ½ (2 ½) – Average at best. Loses points for wearing more layers than the average pass the parcel present
Likeliness to go Crazy: ***** (5) – More “oooh, pretty colors!” than “princess stabbity” with her weapon.
Likeliness to get shipped: *** (3) – Most likely in H/C fics with Brenda Hernandez.
BROWN 03: Eloise Winterburn (What an Ice-burn of a name)
Vain bitch with an ironic interest in the “retro”. Probably a closet hipster. Scowl that could kill most animals and small children under the age of three. Also probably manipulating half of her team before she gets a rubber band in the eye and freaks.
Weapon: Sledgehammer *** (3) – If she can lift the thing without breaking a nail.
School: Detroit Central (Probably a typo, she belongs at SDCR)
Usefulness to Team: ** (2) – She’ll be too busy manipulating them
Eye-Candy Factor: **** (4) – Actually pretty hot when she’s not looking like a bulldog.
Likeliness to go Crazy: **** ½ (4 ½) – Likely to freak out at her team when she finds out they’re too dumb to be manipulated.
Likeliness to get shipped: ** (2) – The new go to if you need a bitch to get beaten down in your fic. Calling it.
BROWN 04: Marion Clayton
Into “privacy”. Piano player which usually means “bitch” if Jessica/Marie/Cerise from seasons 8/9/10 were any example. Into music in general, so expect cheap plugs from her and April discussing music. Most likely on the team to die horribly.
Weapon: Nodachi * (1) – Bigger sword than Sephiroth’s.
School: Silver Dragon Chinese Take-Out
Usefulness to Team: ** (2) – Will insist on carrying her sword around, making her pretty useless.
Eye-Candy Factor: *** (3) – Though she needs to eat a sammich and not dress like she’s permanently at a dinner date.
Likeliness to go Crazy: **** (3) – The quiet reserved types always do.
Likeliness to get shipped: ** (2) – Just not feeling it. She’s gonna get a few and then fizzle out like Joel from Season 6.
BROWN 05: Brenda Hernandez
Mexican kickboxer. Could only be more of a stereotype if she wore a sombrero and ate nachos. Betting she’s getting deported if she wins. Still probably the only competent member of the team, and probably the new face of SotF-TV H/C fics. Roman catholic, too. Got the best weapon of the version.
Weapon: NERF GUN. ***** (5) – Suh-weet.
School: Detroit Central.
Usefulness to Team: **** (4) – No hablo ingles.
Eye-Candy Factor: *** ½ (3 ½) – Muscles don’t do it for me, but there’s /probably/ a market out there.
Likeliness to go Crazy: * (1) – Seems pretty level headed, actually.
Likeliness to get shipped: *** (3) – Most likely in H/C fics with EVERYONE.
OVERALL TEAM RATING: ** (2) – Pretty much boned.
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