Let's talk about the fake teams, shall we? Several groups of wanna be survivors have grouped together despite the fact that they should be murdering each other. Among them is the mess that is Shawn Morrison and Ben Whatshisface.
After a while of Ben being completely stupid with his weapon (an entire bag of bandannas), he figured out how to use it to his advantage, and is now lying to Shawn and saying that they're on the same team. Shawn has no reason not to believe this, despite the fact that his mentor pretty much told him not to trust Ben. In fairness though, that mentor talks in the most complicated ways. Stupid, really. If Shawn was on Jarred's team, then Ben would be dead. However, this already fragile alliance got even more fragile after Shawn murdered Jaszmine Johnson with a snake.
Actually, that reminds me! The Most Amusing Kill Thusfar Award goes to Shawn for that display! Snake death. Who woulda thought?
What was I saying? Oh, yeah. Basically, if Shawn doesn't figure out by morning that Ben- who now has a gun- isn't on his team, then it's because Ben finally did something smart and murdered him.
Or because Shawn is a stoner and most of his braincells are really quite dead.
Moving on!
Up next is the weird mini-team of Jhamel Thomson, Jeanette Beunindia or however you spell it, April Stone, and Brenda Hernandez.
...Oh, and also that Eloise chick, but she doesn't really count because she's not very interesting.
Man, if these four (I'm sorry, five) weren't as terrible at this game as they are, they would almost be kind of fun to watch! I mean, between the group hug, getting a wrench thrown at them, Jeanette deciding to be a player and only telling April, Brenda being a really terrible Team Mom, Eloise wandering off to die, and brilliant product placement of Cliff Bars, there's something for everyone!
Except intelligent people, who would tell you that forming a supergroup based on two separate teams is stupid, especially when one of those teams (*coughBROWNcough*) has no good weapons, while the other has a gun, a wrench, and a knife between two people. Seriously, Jeanette, Jhamel, I get that you're trying to be nice, but get your shit together and start killing before I get my shit together and change the channel.
There's also the downright bizarre team of Marcus Walker and Anna Higgins. I don't even know where to begin on that one. Just...what? I mean, seriously, what. I really want Marcus to start killing people. If he gets rid of the annoying white girl first, well then...I wouldn't be complaining. Just saying.
Other than that, these team-ups have been pretty dreadful. I mean, it's not that they aren't amusing, it's just that so far really only Karen Ruiz has figured out that teams or not, it's kill or be killed. Why hasn't any full team joined up to start killing? That's what I would do. And hey, think of it this way, you're actually saving lives! More people on your team decide to kill, the more people on your team survive. It's win win!
Seriously folks, get your game on.
Right, well, I've got to go find a way to make Max let me back into our apartment. Until then, follow me on twitter @KittyMcHugh, and stay tuned! I promise more fake awards and wonderful drinking games will abound! Cheers!
Actually, that reminds me! The Most Amusing Kill Thusfar Award goes to Shawn for that display! Snake death. Who woulda thought?
What was I saying? Oh, yeah. Basically, if Shawn doesn't figure out by morning that Ben- who now has a gun- isn't on his team, then it's because Ben finally did something smart and murdered him.
Or because Shawn is a stoner and most of his braincells are really quite dead.
Moving on!
Up next is the weird mini-team of Jhamel Thomson, Jeanette Beunindia or however you spell it, April Stone, and Brenda Hernandez.
...Oh, and also that Eloise chick, but she doesn't really count because she's not very interesting.
Man, if these four (I'm sorry, five) weren't as terrible at this game as they are, they would almost be kind of fun to watch! I mean, between the group hug, getting a wrench thrown at them, Jeanette deciding to be a player and only telling April, Brenda being a really terrible Team Mom, Eloise wandering off to die, and brilliant product placement of Cliff Bars, there's something for everyone!
Except intelligent people, who would tell you that forming a supergroup based on two separate teams is stupid, especially when one of those teams (*coughBROWNcough*) has no good weapons, while the other has a gun, a wrench, and a knife between two people. Seriously, Jeanette, Jhamel, I get that you're trying to be nice, but get your shit together and start killing before I get my shit together and change the channel.
There's also the downright bizarre team of Marcus Walker and Anna Higgins. I don't even know where to begin on that one. Just...what? I mean, seriously, what. I really want Marcus to start killing people. If he gets rid of the annoying white girl first, well then...I wouldn't be complaining. Just saying.
Other than that, these team-ups have been pretty dreadful. I mean, it's not that they aren't amusing, it's just that so far really only Karen Ruiz has figured out that teams or not, it's kill or be killed. Why hasn't any full team joined up to start killing? That's what I would do. And hey, think of it this way, you're actually saving lives! More people on your team decide to kill, the more people on your team survive. It's win win!
Seriously folks, get your game on.
Right, well, I've got to go find a way to make Max let me back into our apartment. Until then, follow me on twitter @KittyMcHugh, and stay tuned! I promise more fake awards and wonderful drinking games will abound! Cheers!
