SickKitty Bitches About Teams

Right. So after the temporary delay in your regularly scheduled "me yelling at you all for being idiots" because of a broken laptop, a very small drug induced coma, and Max being a complete and utter asshole, I'm back! And I'm here to fill your lives with my wonderful bitching! Huzzah!

Let's talk about the fake teams, shall we? Several groups of wanna be survivors have grouped together despite the fact that they should be murdering each other. Among them is the mess that is Shawn Morrison and Ben Whatshisface.

After a while of Ben being completely stupid with his weapon (an entire bag of bandannas), he figured out how to use it to his advantage, and is now lying to Shawn and saying that they're on the same team. Shawn has no reason not to believe this, despite the fact that his mentor pretty much told him not to trust Ben. In fairness though, that mentor talks in the most complicated ways. Stupid, really. If Shawn was on Jarred's team, then Ben would be dead. However, this already fragile alliance got even more fragile after Shawn murdered Jaszmine Johnson with a snake.

Actually, that reminds me! The Most Amusing Kill Thusfar Award goes to Shawn for that display! Snake death. Who woulda thought?

What was I saying? Oh, yeah. Basically, if Shawn doesn't figure out by morning that Ben- who now has a gun- isn't on his team, then it's because Ben finally did something smart and murdered him.

Or because Shawn is a stoner and most of his braincells are really quite dead.

Moving on!

Up next is the weird mini-team of Jhamel Thomson, Jeanette Beunindia or however you spell it, April Stone, and Brenda Hernandez.

...Oh, and also that Eloise chick, but she doesn't really count because she's not very interesting.

Man, if these four (I'm sorry, five) weren't as terrible at this game as they are, they would almost be kind of fun to watch! I mean, between the group hug, getting a wrench thrown at them, Jeanette deciding to be a player and only telling April, Brenda being a really terrible Team Mom, Eloise wandering off to die, and brilliant product placement of Cliff Bars, there's something for everyone!

Except intelligent people, who would tell you that forming a supergroup based on two separate teams is stupid, especially when one of those teams (*coughBROWNcough*) has no good weapons, while the other has a gun, a wrench, and a knife between two people. Seriously, Jeanette, Jhamel, I get that you're trying to be nice, but get your shit together and start killing before I get my shit together and change the channel.

There's also the downright bizarre team of Marcus Walker and Anna Higgins. I don't even know where to begin on that one. Just...what? I mean, seriously, what. I really want Marcus to start killing people. If he gets rid of the annoying white girl first, well then...I wouldn't be complaining. Just saying.

Other than that, these team-ups have been pretty dreadful. I mean, it's not that they aren't amusing, it's just that so far really only Karen Ruiz has figured out that teams or not, it's kill or be killed. Why hasn't any full team joined up to start killing? That's what I would do. And hey, think of it this way, you're actually saving lives! More people on your team decide to kill, the more people on your team survive. It's win win!

Seriously folks, get your game on.

Right, well, I've got to go find a way to make Max let me back into our apartment. Until then, follow me on twitter @KittyMcHugh, and stay tuned! I promise more fake awards and wonderful drinking games will abound! Cheers!

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN [Part 7]

RAIN FOREST:

So I was going to do a run through on everything that happened in this location, but then I went on vacation. Well, I'll quickly recap the most recent stuff as I'm sure most of you already watched the early stuff.

Suzanne Lanford gets robbed by Glen Bole as they both shout out to the blogs. Glen actually succeeded in doing something!

At one point a fight broke out between Zachariah Johnston (Yes him again) and Harold Finston Smythe. They talked crapped against each other while Mae St. Clair watched as Zach brutally killed Harold, from apparently a kick to the groin - which I might add is hilarious. Then Shawn Morrison appears causing Zach to run away in what I can only assume is embarrassment after a *ShawnMorrgasm.

Another attractive guy was also in the rain forest. Mr. Leopold Sutherland walked around shirtless in the jungle. Oh and that was basically the WHOLE Segment. Just walking around shirtless in the jungle. Wonderful.

As we've seen before, Todd Hudson has had bad luck. He was robbed by a monkey of his bandanna and now his clothes! He met up, naked, with another bad luck magnet in Sean Davidson. Then they both run away after Axel Stadler and Anna Higgins from Blue show up and then team up.

Sean runs into Jaszmine Johnson eventually, who for the first time Sean doesn't get into a bad situation with. They eventually part ways, where Jaszmine ends up having the worse luck of the two. Is Sean's bad luck, contagious?

Finally the normally upbeat Mason Ross sings "Lion Sleeps Tonight" for us and then switches into what looks like depression when his partner Kevin Fielding's neck inexplicably blows up for no reason. I'm still trying to figure out what could have caused that. He had his bandanna on, so it couldn't have been that. Whatever the case, poor Mason. Love the boy and his talking to the camera ways.

Star of the Scene: Todd Hudson and his exploits in the rain forest will forever be remembered. He is truly King of the Jungle.

HOT SPOT:

A favorite scene for Nery "If You Can't Stand the Heat" features two comedy characters that are great to see, both of which had been beaten up by Vincent Sullivan and had their noses broken, one worse than the other. They team up in what Nery describes as the greatest alliance in all of SOTF-TV Season 65. They are entertainment gold apparently and together even better.

The scene starts off awkward with both boys meeting up sweaty and shirtless, with Glen Bole attempting to be sexy for the cameras and the smaller Jonas Jeffries stripping to reveal his child like body due to the obvious heat. The mentor speaks and tells them that they are being called 'the gay team' which Jonas and his broken nose takes in quietly and backs away slowly from Glen as a response. Glen on the other hand who is pissed off and starts ranting THEN...

For some weird reason Todd Hudson comes running in naked and jumps into the crater! He screams on his way down and the two boys on Pink team give loud screams of their own. It was a tremendous WTF?! Moment!

Star of the Scene: This is an All Star Cast! The three of them are great comic relief!

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN [Part 6]

SKI RESORT:

In "Whatcha Gonna Do" the team of Renee Carlson, Timothy Walker, Kathy Clements and Peter Campbell, meet up with Terrilynn Boden. They search around and not much happens until Timothy Walker starts trying to feel up Kathy Clements. Kathy does not like that and pushes him away. Tim gets more than upset at this and snaps at her, pointing his gun at her after being denied. Renee and Lynn were seen walking down to see what the commotion is all about. There is action to come soon!

Star of the Scene: Timothy adds something to what would otherwise be a super friendly group. He brings about some danger and conflict that is always nice to see in the show. His snap after being denied put me on the edge of my seat. Can't wait to see what he does next!

FOREST:

Devonte Washington, Marcus Walker and Skye Thsani have a grand old time, until an accidental shot from Skye's crossbow causes a major conflict. Marcus is fueled in rage after Devonte is hit and chases after Skye.

In another part of the forest, the next day, Mason Ross becomes the first person to be face to face with Karen Ruiz and lives. She doesn't even attack him and she eeriely gives her reasons on why she killed. "The Teams are Fake." What if she's right?

Star of the Scene: Devonte Washington is quite the charming one, even as he bleeds he wants to go out all cool and not like some kind of chump. Sharp tongue on that boy.

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN [Part 5]

RESORT BEACH:

There is a very long, but still exciting footage, spread out into several episodes already in a saga like form, entitled "Time to Pretend" that we'll break down in a later blog. There's just too much to say about that right now. Basically Gold Team is using the location of one merchandise shack on the beach as a base of operations, sending members of the team and other allies out on 'quests' with others staying in 'the castle' to keep watch. Recently they've been infiltrated by an attacking Panya Bishara, but with the help of Michael Clark, Gold's Alicia White and Mae St. Clair fought back.

Another Segment "We are the Dead" Showed Odile Jones brutally murder both Holly Herchenroder and Jack Lemmon. It was a particularly graphic and disturbing scene, with Odile looking like she was putting on a show for the viewers and enjoying every minute of it. She even stomped on the girl viciously at one point and the disposing of the bodies - wow.

Then there was also "Finders Keepers" where Vincent Sullivan clobbered fail contestant Glen Bole, taking his walkie talkies and then forming an alliance with Orange team mate, Tiffany Dexter. Tiffany plans to organize their team into an army and take down all opponents. That would have been interesting to see, too bad it was short lived.

Star of the Scene: Odile Jones gets the prize again. That was a bloody fantastic show. I also MUST give credit to fairy girl, Alicia White for making "Time to Pretend" seem like an epic fantasy world story. Fairies? Elves? Ogres? Healers? and my favorite... Sluagh. Her jargon is quite amusing!

THE GEYSER:

Let's see Sean Davidson gets beaten up by Bobby Goldman, which was humorous and then Ferric Tam gets abandoned by his team mate Brennan, which was also quite humorous. Ferric's rant as Brennan walking off was also some great comic relief, what with the 'wah wah wah' sound effect they added in!

Currently "Foreshadowing/Hindsights" is the the episode located there. Jacob Langston, Madelyn Conner and Mikaela Warner are looking for runaway Marion Clayton, but give up on their search. They seemingly make plans for escape. I'm not sure if they can pull it off, but escapes are always exciting.

Star of the Scene: Not much has happened yet, so we'll hold off on this for now.

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN [Part 4]

WESTERN BEACH:

The large group of April Stone, Jhamel Thompson, Jeanette Buendia, Eloise Winterburn and Brenda Hernandez settle on another beach. Jhamel breaks down upset which leads to an awkward group hug. He starts shooting to protect the group after Zachariah Johnston throws a wrench at his head. This momentarily scares the group, April Stone is particularly effected and wanders off the next day. Poor girl.

Star of the Scene: I'm really starting to love Jhamel Thompson. It seems underneath that gang persona the kid has a heart, but is still tough enough to protect the group he's in and shoot.

COASTAL LAKE:

Well there was a sex scene which got interupted by Jared Clayton which was quite funny. Then someone dies, but Nery will talk about that later. It seems like Zachariah Johnson is everywhere as here he is again watching Amber Lyons swim naked. Then he follows her and Sterling Odair somewhere. This is truly setting up something or the editors wouldn't all of a sudden cut from naked swimming Amber with the majestic music to Zach hiding nearby and watching with creepy music playing.

After they left Vincent Sullivan showed up and read a book? Not sure what will happen with that.

Star of the Scene: Amber Lyons for being an inexplicable yet accidental camera whore! Sex scene, topless fighting, then naked swimming. Yesh. One for the guys I guess.

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN [Part 3]

INLAND LAKE:

The scene that happened here was "Chain of Sorrow" where Orange Team's Tiffany Dexter and Vincent Sullivan face off against Karen Ruiz. Tiffany and Vincent use team work to their advantage until a stupid mistake. Needless to say Karen continues on with more tools at her dispense.

Star of the Scene: Our favorite Killer Karen Ruiz earns this by escaping victorious and stopping the momentum of what looked to be a huge threat on the island. Now that she put an end to that, Karen has cemented herself as THE threat.

NORTHERN BEACH:

The Segment played here is "Just Pay Separate Processing and Handling" where Skyler Thsani is resting and is ambushed by Daniel Renard, who fails at it. Daniel keeps trying though and 'sucker punches' Skyler to set up another ambush. We'll see if the second ambush will work this time.

Star of the Scene: Daniel Renard hams it up and is being purposely annoying to piss Skye off so he can steal that Crossbow. The boy has some guts to attack an armed opponent, when he doesn't even have a weapon of his own. Let's see if he can pull it off.

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN [Part 2]

OPEN PLAINS:

A lot happened here... Let's see where we should start. Devonte, Marcus and Skye have some nice buddy time here. Cute almost.

Several fights. Vincent Sullivan vs Madelyn Conner, where they bruised each other pretty bad, but Vincent gained a paddle from it. Marvia Jones vs a personal favorite in Karen Ruiz, where Karen gained more fire power and finally Zachariah Johnston vs Marion Clayton where Marion gained a melted face. I still shudder from that one.

Currently a group made of mostly Green team and Sidney Rice are slumbering in the episode "Shun the Non-Believer." It's only a matter of time before something horrible happens there! Otherwise why would the producers title it like that? I'm sure of it.

Also currently ongoing are meetings between Michael Marshall and cute Nate Chauncy and another involving Marcus Walker and two of blue! Anna Higgins and Axel Stadler.

Star of the Scene: Anna Higgins. "Marky Mark!" Hahaha, the delivery of that line was great.

RESORT HOTEL:

The ongoing episode is "Metanoia" where the sexy - I mean, dirty hippie, Shawn Morrison and his fellow wing man Ben-o Grayson (love it!) start searching for people and useful stuff in the Hotel. Ben is still pretending to be Gold with Shawn, while Shawn seems upset about something from the announcements. His friend died or something? Anyway he remedies this by - how else? Smoking Pot of course! In typical Shawn fashion, when his mentor Drake starts giving him advice Shawn freaks out and thinks a snake it talking to him. Love the humorous music they played softly in the background for that part.

Then something -shocking- happens, but that would be spoiling what Nery will cover in the Contestant Spotlight. We'll have to wait and see what happens to the duo of sexy hipster Shawn and the adorable Ben-O, thanks to that cliff hanger they gave us.

Star of the Scene: I'd like to give both members of this duo the spotlight, but Shawn Morrison getting high and doing *something else* earns him the credit here.

Quickfire Recap (By Location!) by RNN

Hello SOTF-TV fandom! It's been a while since we've blogged and I thought we'd bring you up to speed in case you missed a few things! I'll go through each location and recap the latest happens per location, per episode. This will be a non death recap, as the lovely, Nery will be handling those in the Quickfire Contestant Spotlights. So let's get it started right?

DOCKS:

The ongoing episode is entitled "Peers" nice pun there. It starts with Cesar, Bobby and Brennan after leaving behind orange team mate Ferric Tam (what ever happened to that guy?) They form a new group together supposedly and want to go looking for a few of their friends. The Cruise Ship is a danger zone so as expected traffic happens at that pier. Michael Clark and Simon Porter show up, with Michael leaving right away. The announcements happen and Cesar is shocked to hear his little girl friend killed somebody! Then he masturbates for some reason, which I thought was funny, but Nery skipped past that part with our TiVo.

Anyway Odile, Cesar's girlfriend, shows up soon enough and starts pulling bull crap about being attacked. They are quick to believe, except Bobby whose Mentor -MarWIN himself- subtitled through the screen (neat how we the viewers can actually hear the audio clear on our TV's... then again it's MarWIN's voice) told him not to trust her. So he pulls a clever trick to harmlessly disarm Odile, by suggesting she give it to Cesar. It worked. Currently Brennan and Bobby are planning on abandoning the rest of the group. Good choice!

Star of the Scene: Odile Jones, the entertainer that she is. The mysterious entrance with the ominous music, then the cut to her acting scared and playing to the boys' emotions had me screaming "She's a manipulator you fools!"

TAR PITS:

Two Episodes were shown concurrently: "The King in Yellow" and "I Came to Play" well nothing much happened here. Just a bunch of teens making plans. I loved the effect that the editors used to show what happened BEFORE they got there. Then the realization as soon as the Announcements hit. Nery will talk about what happened in the contestant spotlights.

Star of the Scene: Bob Lazenby. Stay tuned for the contestant spotlight.

Video Blog #2 by c0rnch1p

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qoNlXenV6_s

Despite our delay, we're proud to bring you c0rnch1p's second vlog, in which he takes a look at the deaths of Lou Becker, Harold Smythe, Bob Lazenby and Tristan Hart!

Expect more coverage soon!

- Comrade_Snowball

Welcome Back!

Apologies for the lost time guys!

Seems the hacktivists have come out in full force this season, at the worst time. As they've stated, several blogs have been taken down and only a few have retained their content. Feeds of SotF:TV were interrupted these past two weeks in several areas as well- no group has come forward owing up to the sabotage, but it's a reasonable assumption that these attacks were coordinated.

For those of you who've been following Chester's Hitlist, sadly, the content has been completely wiped. A real blow to Chester, who's been an active blogger since the early years, Season 4 to be exact. He's thrown in the towel and announced his retirement from SotF Blogging.

MarWIN's blog has several erased posts, but knowing him, he'll have backups and will be up within a few hours.

As for Survival of the Snarkiest, no content was erased. How our site information was leaked exactly, we don't know. We are currently investigating, and eager to get to the bottom of it.

Expect more content related to SotF: TV soon!

-- ATTENTION --

HELLO FASCISTS.

BY NOW YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED THE LACK OF ACTIVITY ON THIS BLOG- AS WELL AS SEVERAL RELATED SITES IN THE SOTF:TV FANDOM. THESE INCLUDE:

• SURVIVAL OF THE SNARKIEST
• CHESTER'S SOTF HITLIST
• SOTF:AMERICA
• MARWIN'S BLOG - SITE - AND ASSOCIATED CONTENT

THOSE OF YOU WITH BASIC REASONING SKILLS WILL BE ABLE TO PUT TWO AND TWO TOGETHER.

YOU'VE BEEN HACKED. THE WAR BEGINS HERE.

TOO LONG WE'VE SUFFERED IN SILENCE AS THIS FILTH HAS OVERTAKEN THE AIRWAVES. TOO LONG HAVE WE WITNESSED THESE BRUTAL GAMES TAKE PLACE. YOU HAVE WATCHED AND LAUGHED AT SENSELESS MURDER, PERPETRATED BY A REGIME THAT HAS BEEN SUPPRESSING YOUR RIGHTS FOR YEARS.

THIS GENOCIDE ENDS NOW.

YOU WILL PAY DEARLY FOR YOUR IGNORANCE.

WE WILL NOT REST UNTIL WE HAVE RUINED SOTF: TV AND CREATED CHAOS IN THE STREETS. IT IS TIME TO WAKE UP AMERICA. THOSE OF YOU READING THIS, YOU WILL BE OUR FIRST VICTIMS. WE WILL NOT DEMONSTRATE LIKE SOME OF OUR COMRADES, THAT TIME IS LONG PAST.

WHEN WE COME FOR YOU, DO NOT ATTEMPT TO BEG.

SIC SEMPER TYRANNIS.

-tHE cOMPASS (HARBRINGER OF THE REVOLUTION)

Video Blog #1 by c0rnch1p

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lpgi-xacNeE

I'm rather proud to say we've received our first Video Blog, from the ever popular c0rnch1p, a great addition to the Survival of the Snarkiest team. A few of you have expressed concerns in emails that Survival of the Snarkiest doesn't have a video component, like certain other fan sites. Well, here is our answer.

In todays' video c0rnch1p takes a look at the death of Rishi Kohli and Isaac King in depth, giving his thoughts on the subject.

Expect more coverage, both video and analysis' soon!

- Comrade Snowball

A Game of Cunning

Title is a bit of a misnomer here, there are countless advantages one can have in Survival of the Fittest, countless combinations. No one thing is going to propel you above the rest, a simple mistake can mean lights out. It's part of the joy in watching the game, knowing that no matter how much planning our contestants go through, one little slip could change the game landscape dramatically.

Still, doesn't hurt to have an edge, does it?

Our latest poll was about game advantages, what you'd like to have if you were pushed into the game. It had some interesting results, to say the least. Results were:

1) Cunning - 32%

2) Good Draw - 26%

3) Staying Power - 17%

4) Sex Appeal - 11%

5) Speed - 5%

6) Strength - 2%s

6) Popularity - 2%

VERY interesting to see Strength tying for last in this poll. You'd think strength to be one of the (heh, pun) strongest advantages one could have. Not so. Bruisers have gone down fast, be it from a terrible draw or another students trickery.

Who can forget SotF TV Season 3 when favorite to win Frank Bramble was the second to be eliminated? Frank was just the first victim of future winner Travis "Bug" Hood, who used a handful of stolen C4s and his given weapon, a blackjack, to net himself SEVEN kills and a trip home. Ironically, Bug was predicted as one of the first outs not just by the SotF fanbase, but by the players themselves. His ruthless turn to power player came completely unexpected, allowing him to get the jump on many of his fellow classmates. Just one example of brains triumphing over brawn.

With that being said, it's a little easier to see just why exactly 32% went with Cunning as their choice advantage. Until next time, thanks everyone for taking part in this week's poll!

Comrade_Snowball's Game Recap #2 Stray Observations

Random Notes from the Island…

- - Sean Davidson is my predicted next out, given his actions on the Resort Beach. Zach is going to finish him, mark my words. A real pity to see him go down so soon.

- - Marvia Jones and Harold Smythe… It’s obvious that Marvia has more intellect then Harold at this point in time. Still, what could be keeping her around? What has stopped her from killing him? Keep an eye on this pair; I expect their alliance to fall apart- spectacularly.

- - Odile Jones, Odile Jones... Quite the little showgirl we’ve got on our hands! I personally hope for more scenes with her soon, especially if Tiffany is around. Her behaviour is quite erratic but quite entertaining.

- - I may have said Sean is my predicted next out, but another student looks set for the chopping block as well! Glen Bole may be out of a team-mate, and he might not be the smartest student out there, but it looks like he’s got Suzanne Lanford cornered, if he could just get around to finishing her off.

- - Might as well make it three, Bobby Goldman, as of this writing, has gotten into a tight spot with Karen Ruiz, the first killer this Season. He’s still going, but this fight can go either way. Best to check out the clips, it’s a real entertaining battle thus far! I’m hoping Bobby pulls through, at least for a bit longer. But his chances of getting off the Island alive have dwindled oh so low.

- - Holly Herchenroder may win points for her bandanna duplication, but how long can she expect Jack Lemmon to stay undercover? A better plan needs to crop up, or Jack is dead in the water. Will they take the 10 kills option? Definitely stay tuned on this one- the build up has been intense so far, and I'm expecting a big payoff when their plan falls apart.

Comrade_Snowball's Game Recap #2

Well here it is Ladies and Gentlemen, you’ve waited patiently, and Karen Ruiz has finally delivered! Anthony Rollins is the first cast member to clock out this season, the very first kill of Season 65! And boy what a kill it was. I’ll admit it, I didn’t see this kill coming. The group Anthony was rolling with (Pardon the pun) was very tight. Sterling and Amber were allied with Karen, and I hadn’t expected her to open fire, especially after Amber’s tirade.

But she did anyways, prompting thousands upon thousands of pages of discussion on the official SotF Fan Forums. The twittersphere has been on fire; #KarenRuiz has topped the hashtag list for at least the past three days since the footage went live. People all around the country have been asking, just what is she playing at? Is Karen off her rocker like “Reverand” Smythe? Or is she simply thinking ahead? Could she be going after the ten kills?

I’m sad to see Anthony go. But regardless, his death has certainly left quite an impression on the game. Pink Team was never the strongest team, but they ranked at least Mid-Tier. But now with the loss of Anthony (and the continued stupidity of Jonas, Glen and Ben) they’re looking to be an early out.

Anthony wasn’t the only victim. Karen Ruiz managed to inflict quite the nasty wound to resident lunatic Ali White, blowing a finger clean off. It was a lucky shot that is sure to plague her until her inevitable demise. So far this Season has been rather lax on injuries, again, many people are decrying the slow start, but I’m thinking the exact opposite. Getting to know these characters makes the wounds and the death all the more shocking, and all the more brutal. I know I jumped when Ali was attacked. She’s a loony, (even BEFORE SotF: TV) but she is one of the fan favourites, and I myself have grown particularly fond of watching her exploits.

Speaking of fan favourites, take a look over at the tag list on the sidebar. As you can no doubt see, we’ve got a few notable names already in Season 65. The power trio of Shawn, Mae, and Zach have kept the shipping and fan fiction sections of the forum busy as hell, and it isn’t hard to see why. Interesting to note here, while ShawnxMae is wildly regarded as the better of the pairings, at least in the public eye, a quick look around any SotF fansite will reveal QUITE a lot of ZachxMae shippers on the net. Why is this? I don’t mean to offend here, but I sense some serious wish fulfillment going on.

Zach is the ultimate White Knight, and judging from the pre-game footage gathered he’s been harbouring a major crush on Mae for months, maybe years. Mae St. Clair is, to be blunt, beautiful. She’s witty and nice, and more importantly for the fans out there, she talks to Zach, the social challenged boy that he is, and even MORE importantly, she treats him with respect. When SotF was in the early stages, it first caught hold on the internet; the chans and the “nerd” demographic took hold of it and made it their own. This was their show, their chance to dream. What would it be like to kill your enemies, kill anyone who’s ever hated you? It’s one of the things so appealing about SotF: TV, the revenge and the righteous anger dealt out with no penalty. Zach has been aptly dubbed “The Love Martyr”, and he’s one of us. Anyone who’s ever fallen head over heels in love, everyone in the dark corners of the net who’ve been picked on and persecuted, they’re in Zach’s corner. When you think about it, we’ve all got a little bit of Zach in us. While you might not hear him talked about much in public rest assured, he’s a fan favourite. It’s too early to declare him my favourite, but he ranks up with Ali as a definite favourite, at least for me.

As you can see from the tags, other popular students include Marvia Jones, Panya Bishara and Sidney Rice. It’d rather obvious as to why; Marvia’s sex scene has easily been the most overplayed clip this season. Panya Bishara is another hottie, and Sidney has spent her game thus far bouncing around in a bunny costume. Ahhh fan service.

Little note on Marvia and Sidney here. While Panya has remained mostly neutral at this point (Debate is still raging on whether she is playing or not). Marvia has clearly shown she’s got a villainous streak going, beating on Nate Chauncey, stealing her things and then allying with the clearly insane Harold Smythe. (Who might win the record for fastest mental breakdown in SotF: TV, ever!) Sidney likewise, is clearly playing from her actions on the cruise ship. Often times on SotF we find girls who try to strike that ever so desired “Femme Fatale” status, utilizing looks and violence in equal measure to win the game. It’s never been truly achieved, although many have gotten close. Could this be their strategy?

Looks like we’ll have to stay tuned to find out!

I thank you once more for your continued reading! Feel free to voice your opinion down in the comments! This is Comrade_Snowball, signing off!

Contestant Spotlight: Anthony Rollins by RNN

Contestant Spot-Light: Anthony Rollins

Hello snarky readers and SOTF-TV Fans! It's us again, RNN: Rebecca and my lovah-boy Nery. Well not really, just me (Rebecca) today. Sorry for not getting into the blogging party earlier, but better late than never right? I finally had a chance to watch the entirety of SOTF-TV so far and I must say: I'm Loving it!

So what I'm gonna be doing, is this thing called "The Contestant Spot-Light." Where we examine each SOTF-TV teenager in-depth of the current season, and what better way than to start with our first dead contestant!? That's right today's spot light is on Anthony Rollins!


Anthony Rollins (Pink Team)
*The black dude who dies first.*

Episode Segments he was in:
Started: Open Plains "Establishing Shot"
Died: The Forest "Friendly Fire"

Being the first eliminated, Anthony's journey was a very short one, but the kid was pretty fun to watch. If there's something I always enjoy seeing as a viewer, that contestants do, it's when they talk to the cameras. Anthony being a camera guy himself, according to his website profile, typically did this in spades. He even gave us a small close up of his not so small claymore sword. Would have been pretty neat to see the thing in action.

Speaking of small, for an African American, Anthony was pretty short, especially when with those two tall jock looking boys Sterling and Bobby. I feel pretty sorry for Anthony. You could legitimately see the timidness and minor jealousy in his face as eye candy Amber, went to the two eye candy boys and gave them hugs and kisses. Oh the things I've read about rabid fan girls wanting Anthony gone, so the three "pretty people" could have some sort of weird three-way.

I'm glad I'm not like that! I don't just watch for "the hot guys" because well, aside from being practically married to Nery; most of these typical, clean cut jock type "hot guys" just don't do it for me, nor do I watch the show actively looking for them. In fact I said this before, but I'm the type of chick who enjoys when the hot guys die, just so the annoying fan girls STFU, already. If I wanted to see hot guys I'd "read" a playgirl magazine or something. (Erhem.. back to Anthony.)

Poor Anthony. I wanted to just give him a hug of my own, after he both figuratively and literally got overshadowed by the taller, stronger and more conventionally attractive guys. Poor boy gets no love, and I was outwardly rooting on him there. Lovable underdog that he was in many ways. And they gave him a gnome hat too. Which he actually wore! It was quite adorable.

Game Analysis: Anthony's game plan was sound. Find people he knew and stay with them, to hopefully keep himself safe. He teamed up with teenagers he was friendly with at school, in barbie girl, Amber Lyons, and Generic Eye Candy guy, Sterling Odair, and Bobby Goldman, who I think is a Jew. He was smart enough to keep his weapon for himself, when Bobby offered a trade with his crappy metal stick - thing. The two larger guys were good for support/strength to defend him. Also they could've made great meat shields due to their sizes compared to Anthony, for him to hide behind, so it was a good choice to stick with them. Amber his friend would have done her best to keep him alive as well. His one mistake however, adorable as it was, was to wear that gnome hat. He should have taken it off as soon as he could, when Karen started shooting, but he didn't, and we all know what happened there!

Death Look!
I didn't see it live, as I was at work, but the scene was very exciting even watching the replay. Karen Ruiz (one of my favs and pretty much the only likable baddie, so far - don't get me started on Harold and Marvia) saw the group of four and started shooting at them. They all hid in various spots. Anthony being small, hid easily behind one of the trees. Being the crafty sort, Karen threw a rock and caught Anthony's attention. His gnome hat, still on his head came into Karen's view, where it fell on the ground in front of him. Then Anthony followed his hat after moving slightly.

I love both Karen and Anthony, too bad one of them had to die. I really loved Anthony's last words. Even as he chokes on his own blood he still manages to talk to the camera! Of course he falls to the ground and dies, making him the first contestant eliminated, and proving once again, that the majority of the time, in any group: The black guy dies first.

Aftermath predictions: Anthony's death marked the first kill. Karen's rep is now high on the island - it's always that way for the first killers. Amber and her pretty boy will no doubt be affected by this in a big way, and we have yet to see what will happen with the Jew, Bobby... stupid to be continued captions. Anthony had relationships with many of the Detroit Students, so it would have a tremendous impact on them all. The announcements will take a hit on the Detroit students morale, undoubtly, leaving the Silver Dragon Academy students stronger in the beginning, unless someone else dies soon. Anthony's death might have a particularly strong effect on his best friend, partner, and co-sidekick, Anna Higgins. Watching Anna so far, her friend's death might send her over the edge. How will she take it? I can't wait to see.

*

That's all for now. Next time's Contestant spot-light will be in honor of the internet blogger shout outs from two "sucky" kids and another one featuring an awesome Latino. Can you guess who those three are? (comment!)

Also coming up will be RNN's individual review of scenes and episodes by location... I was gonna do the Awesome Cruise Ship scene, but I think one of my fellow blogger's have already covered it. So what better to start the Episode Segment Analysis than at the location that had the most air time so far? That's right it's the rain forest!

P.S. Follow Nery and me at our twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/RebeccaNery. We always have some fun things to say. Nery particularly. Till next time!

On the Homefront...

Hey y'all. Your admin asked me (a native of Detroit) and another blogger (who lives near Bryant) to give you the hoe down on the situation with the teams at the two ground zeros. Wait, does that make sense? Fuck it, I'm on the internet where there is no sense. So, lets start with Detroit.!

First of all if you're planning to visit during this season DON'T wear white. God help you if they even see your socks on accident. Seriously, no virgins should get married here or it'll turn into a red wedding for sure. Fights were breaking out like, well, like SOTF-TV. Except not as deadly, or entertaining. Most of the time that is, but those guys went to jail. Honestly the teams have racked up more kills here then on the show.

The colors you will want to be seen in are: Blue (pissing off the Bloods), Brown, Grey, Orange (even with the mentor), Pink (remember, real men wear pink), Purple, Red (Pissing off the Crips), and Yellow. You're more likely to see those dressed in Grey, Orange, and Purple. More colors being flashed than a gay pride parade here on the streets and in the schools.

Speaking of schools Principal Johnson of DCH and his staff have been having a hell of a time controlling the students. The dress code has been discussed in many meetings School uniforms has been considered, but the school can't get the funding nor are the students willing. Seems like they have a project on their hands while the season plays. Lets hope that banning all SOTF-TV gear will work!

Now I turn things to my rednecked partner in crime, Texas Grrl!

------------

Thanks HomeBoy, and please invest in a belt. It's nice to see your rooting for Team Pink, but, ew. You're no Shawn Morrison.

On topic it white as far as the eye can see here in Bryant, Texas. I'm not just talking about what they're wearing. Seriously, guys, I think Ferric, Mikaela, and Jeanette was all the color they had at this school. I thought I saw an asian girl, but it was just a weaboo. People here are weird.

Besides white you'll see 13, Black, Gold, and Green. Mostly white. So. Much. White. Anyways the fights aren't physical. My connections tell me that it mostly the passive stuff (stare downs, and all that passive shit). Hell, I got a picture of the cafeteria here (Photobucket.com/SDAcafe) that shows how segregated the school's become.

I can tell you now this (IM, obviously not H, O) will be one of the most interesting season of SOTF-TV. It's slow start will give way to the carnage we know and love!

Survival of the Best Dressed...

Our latests poll results have closed, and viewers have weighed in!

This week, we decided to ask you a rather humorous question, "Who's got the best threads?" Fan Service costumes have been a staple for SotF since early seasons, and we always get a few students who decide to suit up. This year it's no different, at this stage in the game no less then 7 students have worn their new duds, and it is truly a sight to behold. From Hula Girls to Geisha's, the cast of Season 65 have been giving us quite a few laughs in between the action.

Now, on to the results!

1) Panya Bishara - 28%

2) Sidney Rice - 21%

3) Jeanette Buendia - 14%

4) Shawn Morrison - 12%

5) Mae St. Clair - 10%

6) Nate Chauncey - 7%

7) Bob Lazenby - 5%

Panya and Sidney blew the competition away, Panya with her adorable (and oddly attractive) Smokey the Bear duds, and Sidney in her Playboy Bunny costume!

Not much to analysis about these poll results, but thanks anyway for everyone who voted! Another will be up soon.

The SotF Drinking Game! (Rules by SickKitty)

Hello lovelies! Okay, for those of you following me on Twitter, you know that I've been spending most of Day 1 completely and utterly drunk. Why? Because I've been developing the super secret ultra drinking game! This year we had a lot of good rules floating around, but I've narrowed it down to the absolute BEST ways to get as hammered as possible. Ready? Let's go!

(A note. Do NOT do all of these at one time, or else your liver will start to look like mine. And that's not a good thing darlings.)

Alright. Here be the rules!

1. Take a shot everytime someone changes clothes. Into an outfit, out of an outfit, doesn't matter. If clothes are coming off, shots are going down.

2. Take a shot everytime Zach Johnson gets overshadowed by the sexy godliness that is Shawn Morrison.

3. Take a shot everytime someone makes an absolutely awful pun. Announcers, mentors, and students are all fair game for this one, as are bloggers, Twitters, commentators- ANYONE MAKING A PUN WILL RESULT IN A SHOT.

4. Take a shot everytime someone from Detroit drops an n-bomb.

5. Take three shots everytime from Silver Dragon drops an n-bomb.

IF DRINKING WITH FRIENDS:

6. Everytime Shawn Morrison appears onscreen, the last person to yell DIRTY HIPPIE must take a shot.

7. Everytime Sidney Rice appears on screen, everyone must scream a month in consecutive order. (So the first time she appears, January, the second, February). The person who says December must down 4 shots.

8. Everytime someone speaks in a language other than English, pour a shot into the communal glass.

9. Everytime someone fires a gun and misses, pour a shot into the communal glass.

10. Everytime someone says something along the lines of "I never thought this would happen to me" or "I don't want to be here" pour two shots into the communal glass.

11. Everytime Ben Grayson switches bandanna's, pour a shot into the communal glass.

12. Everyone pick a team. If the first person to die was on the team you picked, you must down the entire communal glass. (Pick well dearies, this one'll hurt.)

13. Take a shot everytime someone kills someone else. If the person has killed more than one person, take a shot for every person they killed. (So if it's their fourth kill, four shots.)

14. And FINALLY, the last person to pass out must drink the rest of whatever you're drinking. Because otherwise you're no fun.

Righto! If you're still alive in the morning, you can start all over again! Have fun, and take lots of pills for those wicked hangovers! Till next time, this is SickKitty signing out!

"To the Haters..." Written by MidnightQ

BEGIN TRANSMISSION

Hello again readers,

It’s that time again. Once more, MidnightQ is here to give you a different perspective on the life and times of the innocent little children participating in this season of SOTF-TV. (Let’s put aside the fact that children are not innocent and are in fact just as capable of being bad as adults are, shall we?) There are still many people convinced that people, particularly children, don’t deserve to be put on the show. These people make arguments and cite statistics and provide analogies and examples to persuade others that they are correct. I would like to try my hand at accomplishing the opposite. Yes, I’m going to show you why the kids on the current season deserve to be here. (It’s an experiment in futility, but I’m sure it will be at least somewhat amusing.) For this experiment, I’ve decided to use the situation in the Cruise Ship as my proof. Let’s take a look and see why those kids actually deserve to be where they are right now.

First off: a rundown of the participants. We have, in as close to chronological order as a simultaneous broadcast of events can be, Sidney Rice, Joshua Doyle, Jonas Jeffries, Vincent Sullivan, and David Myerez. (I still don’t know how to pronounce your last name David. And that irks me.) Now, we have three students from Silver Dragon Academy, and two from Detroit Central High. Expectations of school allegiances are quickly thrown out the window. Of course, why would we expect such allegiances to last in the face of the game, particularly when guns are involved? What began with an execution scenario with two students became a standoff with the arrival of the third. That standoff in turn become complete chaos as the fourth and fifth arrived. From my observations, I see that these kids truly have no idea what they are doing. Yet, the game mentality seems to override things like common sense and logic. Once thrown into a scenario of kill or be killed, these children drop all pretense of societal norms and think nothing of playing the game. How easy it is to throw away basic human decency, am I correct, kids? (To be frank: if they didn’t, they’d die.)

Speaking of human decency, how long did it take Miss Rice to toss out modesty? Really Sidney? Is there something your parents need to know? Because I see little reason for a rich girl from Texas dressing up like a Playboy Bunny for kicks. (I assume she’s rich. All of the kids from SDA are, I think. I’ll double check later.) Though I suppose when you are all about to die in most likely an incredibly gruesome manner, that’s excusable. Except, of course, that it most certainly is not. Or take Mister Jeffries for example. How much time did he spend weighing the morality of threatening other people with a fully automatic weapon? Did you think it through at all? Did it occur to you at any point that you have a fully loaded deadly weapon, the express purpose of said weapon being to kill people? And how long did it take Mister Doyle to ditch his classmates? How long did it take for Mister Myerez to attack Mister Jeffries? Or for Mister Sullivan to threaten, and startle, him into causing the chaotic fiasco that I am going over again and again? These children have abandoned all sense of humanity. The game mentality has taken them over, whether consciously or not.

So do these kids deserve to be there? Do they deserve to be put into scenarios like the one they found themselves in? For the sake of this argument: yes they do, because they serve as an example of our basest human nature. For when we highly civilized people are put into an area where morality is meaningless and survival is always on the line, then we quickly become conductors of chaos. This in itself is not a bad thing. It reminds us that at our cores, we are truly no better or no worse than anyone else. In truth, everyone deserves to be put into that kind of situation. We should be thankful that we aren’t. Now, I have here in my possession a number of statistics that can back up my claims that humans are merely repressed monsters. However, I’m running out of interest and I honestly don’t believe that at all. (As I said, this is an exercise in futility.) This glimpse into the game really only served as a reminder that no matter the person, anyone can and will play the game when put into it. And that’s why SOTF-TV exists. To let people play the game, and to let everyone else have their fun enjoying it played. It’s a wonderful symbiosis of violence and euphoric response to it, isn’t it?

END TRANSMISISON

"The Camwhore Curse"

The latest poll results have just finished up here on Survival of the Snarkiest! Many thanks to all our voters. And now, for the results!

1) Jeanette Buendia

2) Marvia Jones

3) Mae St. Clair

3) Timothy Walker

3) Panya Bishara

4) Bobby Goldman

4) Glen Bole

4) Harold Smythe

4) Nate Chauncey

5) Sidney Cole

Unlike last time, our results were pretty clear. Jeanette and Marvia quickly shot to the top of the poll. Jeanette via her beach striptease and hula wearing adventures, Marvia for the now infamous "Drug-Sex" scene with Nate Chauncey. Although Marvia put up a fight, Jeanette managed to extend an early lead and come out victorious.

Interesting to note the low ranking of all the males. Yes, it's true that "Camwhore" mainly refers to fan service, but I'd make an argument that Timothy Walker's camera talk makes him far more guilty of "Camwhore" behavior then most, and out of all those tied for third place I personally believe he deserved to medal.

Now, many were opposed to running such a poll so early in the competition, but there were several reasons for this, most importantly the often mentioned "Camwhore Curse". A trend noticed on several reputable SotF blogs (Notably MarWIN's) shows most if not all students displaying "Camwhore" tendencies die out well before the halfway point. In a game like SotF there is no room for mistakes, and those who are intent on hogging screen time often make critical errors.

Time to weigh in on the matter SotF fans. Does this Poll speak truth? Are the front runners doomed to die? Any likely subversions? Comment below!

Location Analysis by sotf67

Season 65 Resort Location Analysis

Hey everyone! It's everyone favorite unknown contributor here, sotf67. (Yeah, I know that most of you probably hate me and my ridiculously long and boring posts, if the lack of comments on the Blue Team Analysis means anything. But hey, a guy can dream.) I've got another dreary analysis for everyone (as you can probably guess by now I'm not good at much else), and this time it's on the locations. Why the locations, you might ask? Well, I think everyone gives way too much emphasis on people and not enough on the terrain the fight on. As everyone should know well by now, terrain is a highly deciding factor in SOTF-TV and indeed it's also a powerful weapon. Environmental kills are great, guys, it makes my day seeing the crazy ways people weaponize the terrain. But hey, enough of my endless rambling, let's get on to the analysis!

THE DOCK

General: Not much to say about this place. It's a pretty basic dock with two anchoring points, one with the Cruise Ship (which we will get to later), and one with a broken, destroyed ship. Not a particularly interesting place, you hardly would come to this island to see it after all.

Predictions: Can't say that there's really going to be a lot happening here, if anything it's just a transit point to the much more interesting cruise ship. A few battles might happen here, and it might show up in an escape attempt. Besides that, there's really very little that you could predict accurately.

Ratings: I really doubt that this is going to be contributing much to the ratings of the show. Unless you have lived really far inland for all of your life, you are bound to see a dock one time or another and even if you have it still wouldn't be very interesting. The only thing that might make it good viewing is the kills...

Environmental Kills: It's a dock, folks, what do you think is going to happen here? People are going to take advantage of the water, maybe using it to drown the idiots who haven't ever learned to swim. Besides that, though, there's not many ways people can take advantage of it.

THE TAR PITS

General: Now, this is a lot more interesting, folks. Looking on some old travel websites, I found out that these tar pits used to be one of the star attractions of the island. Apparently, people came and paid to soak up in the "revitalizing" tar. Wait a minute, what? You read that right folks, people came to soak in the tar. You know, the same kind of tar that brought prehistoric animals to their sticky deaths and preserved their bones as fossils for us to study. Yeah.

Predictions: Ehh, can't predict too much about this one. Interesting environmental kills are likely, maybe a few good battles with the somewhat central position of the pits and some awesome scenery to back it up. The black bubbles do make for an imposing background for a gunfight, if I do say so myself.

Ratings: It was interesting to people before, it'll be interesting to people now. When was the last time you saw some tar pits, folks? Your answer is probably either "very long ago when I was a child" or "never", and for me it's certainly the first. Now add up the exotic location with some interesting environmental kills and good battle scenes, and bam, prime viewing location.

Environmental Kills: Well, it's the tar pits, and we all know that can only mean people will be thrown into the tar, dragged down into the bottom and preserved as fossils for the Earthlings of the future to study. Also, I've looked at some of the weapons and I've actually thought of something interesting - what if Bobby Goldman uses his shopping cart to get people into the tar? Not practical, and not likely, but certainly epic.

THE OPEN PLAINS

General: Basically everything on the island that isn't a special feature. You've seen one of these before, and you know that it's boring as hell and nothing special. Moving on.

Predictions: A little bit of everything will happen here. Why? Because it makes up of a good 80% of the island. Probably not something you will want your TV on 24/7, but might be an interesting watch from time to time.

Ratings: The only reason this might contribute to ratings is because of the "a little bit of everything" nature of the events that will occur. Otherwise, like I've said, "you know that it's boring as hell and nothing special".

Environmental Kills: Unless one of the contestants is highly allergic to grass or something, I highly doubt there will be any special environmental kills here. If there are, though, they will be interesting, you've got to be pretty ingenious to kill someone using flat plains.

THE RESORT HOTEL

General: You know that three-star hotel that you go to when you go on vacation to some small remote island? This is basically the same thing, with beach views all around and a nice pool to boot. Apparently, the reviews of this place say that the walls are way too thin and carry sound easily, which might have some interesting gameplay applications. Besides that, it's pretty generic and isn't a major attraction of the island and more of a necessity then anything. Although I do wonder, where does the hotel get it's supplies from? People need to eat, and there's not much dock space or any farms as far as I can see. Anyways, while I'm on supplies...

Predictions: Well, any halfway intelligent. person is bound to raid the kitchen sometime or another. No one's done it yet, but I'm expecting it to be done in a day or so. The place is also probably going to be alluring to the less wilderness-inclined of the competitors, so I'm expecting lots of meetings here to come. Maybe a few other interesting scenes, it's hard to say.

Ratings: Might be a decent rating engine, as not everyone enjoys seeing a bunch of kids plowing around dirty and tired in the wilderness. Again, the scenes that take place here might be interesting, and there might be a few decent kills that give the ratings a good boost...

Environmental Kills: Moderately tall building, lots of glass windows, anyone know what I'm thinking? You probably know since it's so obvious, but in case anyone here is too brain-dead to think of it there's a fairly high chance that there will be at least one person falling to their deaths here. Besides that, not many likely environmental kills, I'm afraid, but the first one here will be nice viewing.

THE INLAND LAKE

General: It's really just a small lake with some small docks, you've probably seen one of these before. One of two lakes on the island. Since this is a lake, you can probably guess what's here - bo- wait, no, I mean kayaks and canoes. Also a few cabins, might be nice as shelter for any wanderers who don't want to sleep outdoors like a real (wo)man. That sums up this place nicely.

Predictions: Well, someone is bound to come here to look for things to help them escape, but they are going to leave disappointed. Some nice scenes might be here, one's already developing as we speak. Kills might be lacking though, but then again one can never really know.

Ratings: Ehh, like a lot of the island this is a pretty generic place. Again, there might be some nice scenes but it looks like this place will be pretty tranquil, all told. Probably not going to boost ratings much, but there are surprise hits often enough, in many more ways then one.

Environmental Kills: Well, like every other place that's next to water, there probably might be some drowning kills here. Besides that, I really don't think there's going to be much of interest here, the inland lake doesn't exactly scream "lethal" to me.

THE NORTHERN BEACH

General: This one's not your generic, badly maintained and ugly looking beach, this one's actually a pretty nice place to look at, if the pictures on travel websites are anything to go by. Apparently it was once pretty popular for marriages and honeymoons, and for good reason. Besides that, not too much to say about this one.

Predictions: Well, it was used for marriages and honeymoons then, why can't it be used for some romance scenes now? It's a pretty nice place, all told, seeing some actual romance here instead of the shameless fanservice would be a very nice touch to this season of the show. Besides that, probably not much will happen, it's too isolated from the rest of the island.

Ratings: Well, if the romance scenes I have predicted actually do happen, I expect a good ratings powerhouse. Call me what you would like, but I actually do enjoy watching decent romance scenes over the fanservice scenes as well as the... objectionable content... ones. I expect plenty of other fans are with me on this, and I only hope the producers will actually try to cater to us.

Environmental Kills: MAYBE drowning like I've brought up so many times before, again I really don't see anything lethal about this place, it's just too serene and isolated. Hell, I doubt there will be many kills here at all, to be completely honest...

THE WESTERN BEACH

General: Another of the beaches on the island, this one's a pretty lonely and empty stretch. There's a rental boat shack here, but from the few released photos I can see quite well that they are dilapidated eyesores that sorely need fixing up. Besides that, it's pretty much the most boring out of all the three beaches.

Predictions: Maybe a few lonely wanderers might come and go, we might see some interesting individual scenes, but most likely not. Very few people will come here, it's just too empty and featureless. Might be OK for hiding out, but it's not exactly a good place to hole up.

Ratings: Ehh, probably too boring (and thus unwatched) to boost ratings much, probably will be somewhat detrimental if anything. Still, I'm just taking a gander here, and exciting scenes can crop up anywhere in SOTF-TV, which is of course one of my favorite parts of the show.

Environmental Kills: There's water here! People can drown! Yeah, I'm really strapped for ideas here, but much like the northern beach I seriously doubt that there will be many environmental or regular kills here.

THE COASTAL LAKE

General: The second of the two lakes here on the island, pretty much the same as it's inland sibling minus the "calming" surroundings with the salt air and sound of waves (or at least that's what one of the travel websites says). There's apparently a small sailboat in the center with it's mast poking out of the waterline too, interestingly enough. Finally, please allow me a moment for a tangent. Why in the world is this lake named "The Coastal Lake" and the other "The Inland Lake" when both of them are inland and both fairly close to the coast? Again, I can't help but feel that the producers are horrible at giving names to things and people (see the "The Foreign Ambassador" rant/tangent in Blue Team Analysis), but whatever.

Predictions: Not really predicting much to happen here, if anything it'll be a relaxing scene to look at when we don't feel like getting adrenaline rushes from the actions scenes. Maybe someone stupid will try to swim to the sailboat, but they would have to be REALLY, REALLY stupid to do that and I don't really see it as being likely. So overall, nice scenery, dull viewing.

Ratings: Ehh, just another generic and boring place to watch, probably not going to help ratings much unless something really interesting happens like someone swimming to the sailboat (and subsequently drowning), but that's about all that can really be said really.

Environmental Kills: There's water here, people will drown, herp derp derp! Please forgive me for repeating that every single time, but really, there's not much about this place that could be taken advantage of. Maybe a fall from the cliffs? We'll just have to see.

THE RESORT BEACH

General: The final and most visited member of the trio of beaches on the island. Remember when I mentioned generic, badly maintained and ugly looking beaches in the northern beach analysis? This is basically the same thing, with the customary abandoned food/merchandise (read: tourist junk) stands (someone smart would loot them), litter, and seaweed. By far the longest stretch of beach, and, well, that about sums it up.

Predictions: Really not much to predict here, yet another boring beach like the western one. I expect to see some looting of stands, and not really much else more. Will probably have much more traffic and thus action due to it's length and position, but it's really impossible to say for sure.

Ratings: Like so many of the other locations, I really cannot see this place driving ratings up much. It's a fairly generic place, and something of an eyesore if anything, so don't expect a lot of people to tune in unless there are some really interesting scenes.

Environmental Kills: ...do I really have to type this out again? TL;DR, "sotf67's an uncreative idiot and thinks people will drown here because there's water".

THE CRUISE SHIP

General: Finally! An actually interesting location! The ship's not really all that special by itself, but it is an excellent addition to the island by the producers. Of course, the motor has been removed, taking out the most obvious escape method. No matter what some might say, the producers are certainly not THAT stupid. Besides that, just generic bedrooms and a restaurant and swimming pool.

Predictions: Well, like I've said before of the various other locations here that might have supplies, anyone halfway intelligent would loot the restaurant. I expect to see a lot of action here, as practically anyone would go on here if they thought they had an actually halfway decent chance of escape. Also, expect a stalled escape attempt sometime towards the midgame, it only seems obvious.

Ratings: A downright attention-grabbing place compared to many of the others. There should be a lot of good scenes here to satisfy a variety of desires, so this should definitely be a ratings powerhouse. And if anyone can actually get this thing to work, well, I'll tip my hat onto them and watch as this becomes one of the highest rated SOTF-TV episodes out there.

Environmental Kills: Blah blah blah drowning in the water blah blah blah. Maybe someone eats something in the restaurant and goes and swims in the pool and drowns. Nah, that's just stupid. I can totally visualize all of you sitting back at home at your computers, reading this and thinking to yourself, "Man, sotf67 is such a dork."

THE GEYSER

General: Another interesting location! While this thing isn't exactly Old Faithful, this thing reportedly sprays once a day without fail, or as according to the travel websites. A bit suspicious if you ask me, but whatever, it's hardly going to matter.

Predictions: I actually can't see much of interest happening here. A geyser, while interesting, is not exactly the first thing you'd see out of all the island features and only goes off once a day anyways. I doubt there will be any major action scenes here, but maybe some conversation scenes will be nice.

Ratings: I've already predicted little action, and that means little ratings. Could potentially be interesting, but I highly doubt that such an event will occur and drive the ratings up. Still, if the geyser isn't completely natural as some people have suspected, producer interference could actually shake things (and the ratings) up...

Environmental Kills: I really actually can't see any environmental kills happening here short of someone going right into the geyser. Even that probably wouldn't kill someone immediately, but hey, geysers are hot. Maybe someone gets scalded to death. Again, I don't know here and I don't really think anyone does.

THE SKI RESORT

General: Hey, another (comparatively) interesting place! The ski resort is not really all that special, as far as ski resorts go, but this is definitely more interesting then the other locations. The motor's been destroyed for reasons obvious enough, so access isn't exactly great, as everyone has to go up through a slick and slippery path. (Hurrah for alliteration.) At the bottom, there's also a lodge and rental booth but again I don't think those will influence gameplay much. Oh, and there's snow everywhere. That's pretty much all.

Predictions: Someone smart might want to look at the rental booth and maybe collect a ski pole as a makeshift weapon if necessary. It could also be a decent place to hole up due to the bad accessibility, but whoever would do so would have a horrible time trying to leave. Can't see too much interesting stuff happening here, though, just too isolated and hard to reach.

Ratings: Ehh, might not be as good for ratings as one might think. It'll be rather polarized, either extremely interesting or mind-bogglingly boring. All depends on the kind of scenes that happen to crop up.

Environmental Kills: The ice can be taken advantage of the cause people to fall and slip to their deaths, but that's about it really. For all of you out there who are screaming "AVALANCHE" at me, I seriously doubt that that will work. Avalanches need serious and heavy buildup of snow, and that seems to be lacking here. Still, the producers might pull a fast one on us and interfere, we never really know.

THE FOREST

General: It's a forest. There's not much else to say about it. If any of you out there haven't seen one of these before, either you live in a really extreme location or you have my deepest pity. One or the other, depending on who you are.

Predictions: Hard to guess, really. Forests are not good places for meetings, as for the most part people will probably get through it without meeting anyone else. Speaking of getting through it, it will most likely simply be a transit point between more interesting locations. It also might be another decent hiding spot, but that's a pretty iffy prediction if anything.

Ratings: Really not that special and not that conducive to action. If you like peace and tranquility, you might want to tune onto this place, but honestly I doubt that anything interesting will happen here. Still, it's big enough to hold some surprises and it's in a decent location, so eh, fifty-fifty.

Environmental Kills: No matter what one may think, it's not that easy to survive in a forest. The forest itself is not exactly deadly though, and unless someone knocks a tree over on top of someone or something I'm not seeing many environmental kills. Then again maybe we'll see some wildlife lash out? I want to see another brutal mauling by a bear again, that's something that never gets old no matter what season it is.

THE RAIN FOREST

General: I doubt many of you guys have seen one of these before in person. Still, I doubt ANY of you have seen one on the same island as a SKI RESORT. Honestly, how is this possible? Maybe the hotspot (which I'll elaborate on later) affects the climate somehow, but honestly it's pretty amazing. As for the forest itself, it's fairly standard as rainforests go, and only has one interesting features, a "jungle safari". And when there's a safari, there's wildlife...

Predictions: A few decent scenes at least (and there's already been one, that is if you like fanservice), this is a major and attention-grabbing location. Probably not too many chance encounters, though, the vegetation is just way too thick. Maybe some people will get- wait, that belongs in a different section.

Ratings: This should definitely be decent, if not good, simply due to the size and exotically of the location. Actually, the rain forest does actually have one of the clips with one of the better ratings at the moment, for reasons I'd rather not elaborate on. Just YouTube "rain forest mae" and you'll know what I mean, if you don't already.

Environmental Kills: People will probably get lost and mangled by animals. Although conversely, I'll also expect lots of animals to die, like the snake that Zach took so much pleasure in killing. Like the regular forest, it's not exactly easy to take advantage of, but it might be possible, somehow.

THE HOT SPOT

General: The hot spot is the final location on the island. Apparently it's some kind of semi-volcanic opening, which would help to explain why the rain forest is there in the first place and the presence of the geyser as well. It does happen to be fenced off, but now without anyone to watch it I highly doubt those fences will come to mean anything anymore.

Predictions: I'm hoping for a couple of good scenes with how interesting the location is. The one with Todd Hudson was decent enough for me, though, it made me laugh hard enough to almost throw up. Let's just hope for a few more decent ones after that, shall we?

Ratings: The feature is unique enough to garner some ratings on it's own. With a few more decent scenes, it could be one of the best rating-generations on SOTF-TV, but we can never be sure. It definitely should definitely pack a disproportionate amount of ratings compared to size, though.

Environmental Kills: People will fall into/get pushed into the hotspot, duh. Don't need to be a genius to figure that out, even if I am (yeah, that's a horribly lame joke). If you can think of anything else, kudos to you. But I'm spent.

...and that concludes my locations analysis! I hope you had fun reading it, but if it was that long, you probably haven't But whatever, at least it's there if you ever feel the urge to read it.

~sotf67

The Starties! [Hosted by SickKitty] (Part 2)

(Part 2) continued...

The 55 in a 54 Zone Prize for "best and blackest" heads over to Devonte Washington for quite possibly being the only reason to ever move to Detroit ever. Seriously. He's so black that if I stand next to him for too long, I'll probably get a killer tan. Haters gonna hate Devonte, but you keep doing your thing, g.

The How the Fuck Do I Work This Award goes to Jonas Jeffries for pretty much attacking the entire universe with bullets. I think one flew through my TV and broke my vase. Well, Max's vase. Well, Max's mom's prized Vase from ancient times. It wasn't like I knocked it over while drunkenly dancing or anything. Nope. It was all Jonas up in this. Honest.

The Best for the Ad Execs prize goes to Jeanette Buendia for flashing the cameras. Let's be honest, if that amazing ass isn't all over the DVD box covers, then the producers have failed us all.

AND FINALLY:

The SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH award goes to Anna Higgins. Who screamed. And did nothing else. Oh my god SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH.

Honorable mentions include the Rosaline Prize for "most forgotten love interest" toZachariah Johnson, who will never live up to the godly sexy godliness of sex that is Shawn Morrison, and the Little Jimmy is Feeling New Things Down There Award for "most awkward moment to become sexually aroused" to Bobby Goldman for getting a massive erection at the sight of Amber Lyons. No worries Bobby, those things you're feeling are a perfectly natural part of growing up.

Alrighty lovers, SickKitty is out for now. Remember to keep your pretty ears peeled for the first Season 65 Max and Kitty podcast, and until next time, keep on stripping ladies!

The Starties! [Hosted by SickKitty] (Part 1)

That's right bitches, ho's, and the socially depraved, it's time for everyone's favorite award show, The Starties! Who will take home the wonderful prize of my foot of their ass, who will go home disappointed, who will go down in history as the most wonderfully pathetic? All your answers, right here, right now! So let's go!

The Golden Ass Award for "stupidest start" goes to Ali White who, despite being warned vocally about this, still managed to forget to put on her bandana and nearly got herself blown up. Great work Ali, you almost went down in history as the Queen of the Darwin Deaths, but instead you scrape by to annoy me another week. I hope you're fucking happy.

The Raped With a Coat Hanger Prize for "most creepily disturbed start" goes to Lesbian Bench Sex! Marvia Jones date raped Nate Chauncey for reasons I don't entirely understand, nor really want too! All I know is that it wasn't very sexy, was horrendously creepy, and may have officially ruined sex for me forever.

Oh wait that's not possible. Well, you almost did it girls. Close enough.

The Backwards Ball Cap Award for "most hilariously bad at being down with the homies" goes to Todd Hudson for being whiter than Max in the middle of winter. You did good kid. Make your white-ass Texas parents proud. Dag straight yo, right up tripping in this bitch, wheezy, ya hear ho? You HEAR?

Up next is the Fire In My Heart Award for "starting a forest fire deep within me" which goes to Panya Bishara, for being the only person on the island responsible enough to know that she can prevent wildfires. You go girl. You go and you spread your message. (And also your legs, you pretty thang you.)

Ajax's Fanservice Five

Hello again Gentelmen, Lesbians and *Gasp* Is that a straight girl I see?

No? No. Damn.

Well, Seeing as I am the only member who doesn’t either A) have a wife/girlfriend, so has never wanted another girl sexually in the history of his life, Or, B) A stick up his arse the size of Texas, It falls to me to give Y’all the lowdown on the babes of this season.

That’s right fellas, it’s the:

Fanservice 5. MK2

Right, dropping in at number 5, is Mae St. Clair. I know a few of you might be in disagreement here, given her rather thin, athletic figure. And the B-Cup associated with it. However, she – as her (Sadly short lived, fuck you Shawn and Zach) Geisha costume showed – knows how to accentuate it perfectly.

Pros: Ballerina, so flexible She’s also very rich and pretty dominant, so if you like Fem-Dom, she’s your girl.

Cons: At the centre of a goddamn Love Triangle, also, incredibly cold. Like, if you fucked her, you’d probably get frostbite cold. Also, probably a holder of her V-card.

Stepping up to the deck at 4th place, is Jeanette Buendia. She is another of the smaller competitors, filling up another B-Cup. You know, I’d think that one of the producers had a smalltit fetish, but, well, its more than counteracted. Also, in a side note, her face is so cute! I almost went weeaboo there and did the thing with the K, a, w and a buttload of I’s. Its that cute.

Pros: Unlike our above contender, has plenty of experience. Also, she was quite good with that little stripdance into a hula girl costume. Has she had more… Professional training? Ahh, I kid y’all again, but it was damn hot.

Cons: Is probably completely insane. I mean, who does a stripdance, for the camerals, on national television, then sunbathes? ON AN ISLAND FULL OF MURDERERS? Girls got a screw loose. Not that I’m complaining.

Coming down to scoop the bronze is none other than Eloise Winterburn, who has the nicest D-Cups I’ve seen in a while, and has a very high class look. Trust me, I know how the upper classes look, and she is bang on that. I’ve gotta say, I love it.

Pros: BISEXUAL *Ahem* Sorry ‘bout that, but if you get her and No.2 in a room and take pictures, I would love you forever. Also, as with all the SDA students, More money than sense.
Cons: That scowl. I’m sorry, but a cute smile just makes a girl for me, and she just refuses to do it.

Second place goes to Amber Lyons. If you need to ask why, you are probably either a girl, or a gay guy. Or blind. She’s another pint sized pretty, her pert little body-

Sorry, slipped into Fanfic mode there. And… Yup, thats yet another FBI watchlist for me! Yaaaaaay!

Pros: BISEX- Oh, wait, I already did that gag, didn’t I? Shoot. I’m sorry, but that video is amazing.

Cons: … Um… No.


Finnaly, swooping in to take Pirate gold is Ms. Panya. Arguably this is predictable, but really? Can you blame me? This is the girl walking around in a furry costume! (Not a fan of Smokey myself, more of a Nekomimi fan personally, but I’ll take it where I can)

Cannot… Comprehend… Hotness…

Pros: Launcher of a thousand ships. With good reason.

Cons: Apart from being rather firmly in the “Out of my league” department, none.

Honourable mentions to… Just about every girl. Seriously.

So, let me know who your top 5 are (Guys and gals) in the comments!

The Fan Favorites

We've all seen the polls before, "Who's the first out", "Who's going to win it all", the standard stuff that's brought up every SotF Season. And baring a few notable cases, we've had clear frontrunner's, day in and day out. It might not always come true (Which is the beauty of SotF), but at least the fan base can decide on something.

Not this time around! With the introduction of teams, all the odds-makers in Vegas are scrambling to rework their system, and it looks like the fan base is equally divided!

And at the end of the day, Red Team, Yellow Team, Purple Team and Team 13 are locked in a four-way tie for first, in the first ever Survival of the Snarkiest "Front Runner Poll".

Every team is (still) at full strength, and it's hard to tell who'll come out on top. All of these teams have had a strong start (Especially Purple and Red, Karen Ruiz and Marvia Jones looking extremely proactive out there.)

While we can't tell the winner just yet, the stragglers are becoming apparent. Grey Team garnered zero votes, sitting in dead last. Can't really blame that choice, with the loss of their sole weapon, they're looking very shaky. Also near the bottom of the poll was the Blue Team. I'm going to have to dispute this slightly, while Joshua Doyle and Anna Higgins have shown their red shirts, Jasz and Axel have proven to be quite useful thus far. Lou Becker seems to be AWOL at the moment, judging from lack of footage. Would two team members be enough to carry Blue Team to the finals though? Unless we see a change of course, it's looking grim for them.

Can they turn it around? We'll just have to watch and see!

FULL RESULTS

1) Red Team
1) Purple Team
1) Team 13
1) Yellow Team
2) Pink Team
3) Green Team
3) Brown Team
4) Orange Team
4) White Team
4) Black Team
4) Gold Team
5) Blue Team
6) Grey Team

N/A Loner Boy - (Not Polled;Survival Percentage currently hovering around 1.5%)

The Fanservice 5! by Hollysparkles

Who's the cutest boy in Season 65!?

OMG Hi you guys, this is HollySparkles here asking the most DUH-TASTIC question of all! Who is the cutest boy on the island? Now, I've like been painstakingly watching like, every second up until this point, and I've totally narrowed it down to these five boys. OMG CHECK OUT THE HAWTNESS:

1. GLD4: Shawn Morrison. OMG you guys you totally knew that I was going to put him first!!!! Here me out though, he's sweet, adorable (those EYES) sensitive, loves animals and had GREAT hair. I think he is a vegetarian which totally just makes him CUTER.

Pros: He is totally chill and sweet and omg. Did you see him give those flowers to Mae? SO ROMANTIC. Like, his eyes again? OMG his eyes.

Cons: That slut Mae St. Clair. He spends way too much time drooling over her (I was crushed when I watched that promo "Rescue Mission" just let the stupid drunk bitch drown!)

Conclusion: I am like, shipping him with only one person, ME. Now drop that stupid whore and get with a girl who REALLY loves you. (Me.)

2. BRN1: Nick Simmons. I know he's like not the most popular choice, but I TOTALLY DIG his blond hair, you know? There are a lot of blondes this season but I think Nick really like hot.

Pros: His hair duuuhhh, but he loves grunge and I am totally all about that. OMG CAN HE PLAY GUITAR? Someone find his facebook page lol.

Cons: He's poor. He's like. Really poor. He also curses a lot and come on how can you take that home to your mother? At least so far he hasn't been horrible or anything in game....which reminds me....

3. YLW5: Jake Langston. Another blonde boy!!! This one is cute (although he looks like, so sad) and he seemed nice in the promos, but now he seems to have a sort of jerk streak. I mean, maybe he just needs the right girl, AM I RIGHT? OMG. <3

Pros: He definitely plays guitar and has adorable eyes. Also super tall.

Cons: I read on some other blog that he had a girlfriend, then omg he mentions that it's Madelyn Connor and they aren't even on the same team. DROP HER. LOL. JUST LIKE, BREAK UP WITH HER. Also, he hasn't gotten off to like, any sort of good start in the game, he was really mean when he waved that gun at Bob Lazenby.

4. PRP5: Sterling Odair. Another one that is like, totally obvious. Sterling has great eyes and omg his hair. You just want to run your fingers through it amiright? I mean like, I heard some things on the internet and this guy is totally for the fanfiction.

Pros: THOSE EYES. Rivaling Shawn Morrison's in how pretty. And THAT HAIR. I'd pay to touch it I think. I would like, totally pay to touch it. ALSO he's bisexual and like, how hot is that? You should ship him with anyone. Like, totally anyone.

Cons: He threw out his asspants. HOW CAN YOU THROW OUT YOUR ASSPANTS, STERLING?

5. W04: Leopold Sutherland. By far the most squeeworthy to me, but then again it's because I like them rich and skinny lol amiright? He's very broody and also blond. Lol what is it with me and blondes?

Pros: Um. RICH? Um. Like, he's like a prince!? Also I think he got a Doctor Who outfit so I've already started a fanfiction where he replaces the doctor.

Cons: So far he's just been brooding on the show, I really really really super can't wait for him to start doing stuff!! Also he threw away his weapon, omg it would have been totally hot if he ran into Sterling with that thing. LOL get it? Ran into? ;-)


So those are my top five picks! Honorable mentions go to: Cesar Perdomo, Skyler Thsani, and Mason Ross. Who are your favorites, viewers? Girls are totally welcome too!!!!

Mad Max's Rest of The Crap

Yawn. After the first couple hours, this game is shaping up- just like the last few seasons, to be the who’s who of who cares.

So, in light of this game being full of losers and bigger losers, I’m taking it upon myself to sift through the hours of footage and provide you will my highlight reel of expert opinion.

Welcome, peeps, to Mad Max’s Rest of the Crap.

No insights/interviews/columns today, seeing as everyone's busy watching/writing right now, so you guys will just have to make do with Quickfire crap and the usual stuff I put at the end.

Quickfire Crap:

Best … awkward love triangle goes to Mae St. Clair the hoe, Shawn Morrison the hippie and Zachariah Johnson the Snake-Eater for their surprisingly good scene in the waterfall. Kitty no doubt has Mae stripping DVR’d.

RIP Snake, by the way. You were a true American hero. Goodnight, Sweet Prince.

Worst … way of stealing a bandanna ever, Marvia Jones. Also, ratings and lesbians or not, I may or may not have raged at the stupidity of Natalie Chauncey and Marvia there, so stop sending me your “OMG DID U SEE MARVIA/NATE” messages while drooling at your keyboard.

Seriously, I’m surprised at how quickly people have adjusted to the teams. Actually can’t wait to see how they all form together.

I’d love it if… Ben Grayson would actually use the bandannas to his advantage, rather than just randomly putting one on like a tard.

Please kill… Harold Smythe. There’s no way this guy isn’t going to hurt himself. Also Nate, for taking MDMA from strangers. It’s the nicest way.

No Highight/Darklight of the Night yet, since it’s the morning still. So we’ll have good old Best Start/Worst Start instead.

Best Start: Todd Hudson, for creating a whole bunch of racial arguments on the internet after pulling a Harlem Heat and calling someone the n-word.

Worst Start: Tie: Poor John Benson just can’t catch a break. A fitting punishment for hitting Team Brown’s Mom with a Nerf Gun. Nate Chauncey takes MDMA and gets date raped and robbed. That’s just bad.

Until next week, follow me on twitter at @MadMax3967, send hate mail to electricworry21@gmail.com, and be jealous.

Comrade_Snowball's Game Recap #1 Stray Observations

Stray Observations

Idiotic players weren’t the only thing I noticed. Take a look at some of the other things that’ve caught my attention!

- Marvia Jones and Natalie Chauncey – you knew I was bound to mention this scene; it’s one for the highlight reel. Sex scenes are always common, but sex on ecstasy? Marvia propelled her popularity into the stratosphere with that choice. She’s unleashed a torrent of fanfics, pairing her with everyone from Jared Clayton to Alicia White! I’m quite sure no one expected the ending to that. Natalie won’t die from not wearing a bandanna, but she’s definitely going to have some problems linking with her team, what with Marvia now impersonating her. Marvia, definitely a late-gamer and one to watch.

- As I’ve noted before, the weaker teams are clearly becoming visible. Black Team and Grey Team have had several early game bumps, and Green Team still has that mentor handicap to get over.

- Bobby Goldman and Axel Stadler have proven to be quite brilliant strategists, displaying a knack for creative thinking when it comes to scavenging for supplies and making due with what they have. I expect a real fight from them.

- Sidney Rice, Timothy Walker and Karen Ruiz have established themselves as early game players. Not sure what exactly Jonas Jeffries plan is, (his actions are a little too bizarre and I can’t peg him down as a villain or not) but it is fairly obvious from Sidney’s behaviour she was looking for a kill on Joshua Doyle. I didn’t expect Karen Ruiz to swing toward murder quite so fast, if at all. Definitely a bonus to the Purple Team, one I did not count on initially.

- Timothy Walker is proving to be an absolute joy to watch, and a natural on camera. So many students forget the cameras’ are there, but following him it seems like everything is one big joke, and the viewer is the only one in on it. Aside from him of course. Pure gold, that kid.

- I was pleased to see some students actually showing an appreciation for their costumes. Mae St. Clair in full Kimono was a sight for the ages, (as was her stripping shortly after) and Sidney and Panya Bishara look to have no intention of ditching their respective costumes.

- Alicia White has proven to be quite the spacey one, nearly getting her head blown off after forgetting to affix her bandanna. Really? Liability if I ever saw one.

- Some students have been noticeably absent so far. Lost in the jungle perhaps?

That’s all for now folks. Stay tuned to Survival of the Snarkiest for more coverage!

Comrade_Snowball's Game Recap #1 The Idiot Box

The Idiot Box

SotF: TV has had a long running tradition of idiotic or cannon fodder players. I think it would be fitting to take a moment now, point out a few kids who aren’t just cutting it, for one reason or the other

- Bob Lazenby - Every season has them, the whiners who bundle up into a ball, sobbing away until a bullet puts them out of their misery. Bob has not had a strong start, and has proven utterly useless. (Another handicap for the Black Team...)

- Ben Grayson – Now I know what you’re thinking. Ben has been given an ideal weapon for the early stages, the ability to disguise himself as a member of any team he may choose. But his methods have been pitiful at best. Throwing on a bandanna at random, he’s been trudging around, approaching random players, even when the bandannas clearly show an opposing team. I’m surprised he hasn’t been killed yet. Bad luck for Pink Team, their strategic weapon, stuck with by far one of the dimmest bulbs we’ve seen yet on SotF: TV

- John Benson – John had a particularly good stroke of luck, running across Jhamel Thompson and Brenda early on. The potential for an alliance was there, but John quickly established himself as a stuck up jerk, hitting Brenda with her own weapon, showing a lack of respect for April Stone and antagonizing Jhamel, seeking a weapon trade. It’s come back to bite him in the ass, his behaviour has led to his exclusion from the potential alliance. Youch.

- Jonas Jeffries – I pegged this jitterbug as an entertainment source, and boy was I right. Almost immediately Jonas was up and about, surprising a group of SDA students with his MAC-10. Unfortunately for Jonas, not being one of the smartest, he didn’t bother to read the manual, and after being surprised by Vincent Sullivan he was off. The resulting gunfire was spectacular, but didn’t result in any kills. He’s as good as dead as soon as the others get their bearings.

- Todd Hudson – I can overlook Todd mistaking Marcus Walker’s Yellow Bandanna for a Gold one. A stupid decision, but understandable. But as soon as he opened his mouth, Todd secured the status as “Mr. Too Dumb to Live”. Really Todd? Nigga? To the pissed off black boy?

- Natalie Chauncey, taking candy from strangers. Jees. First she gets snuck up on and nearly shot, next, she's taking pills with some girl in the park? Brain dead much? I wonder if this girl has a death wish or something...

Comrade_Snowball's Game Recap #1 PART 2

A lot of friends and lovers have been broken up over the years in SotF, but this is the first season where it isn’t technically the end. The “10 Kills” dynamic is back; sure it involves getting your hands soaked in blood, but now more than ever our players have options. Anyone could beat the odds; kill ten and a free ticket home, regardless of who is left in the game. Could Jack be taking that option, hoping Holly and the Black Team join him? He’s a pacifist, but we all know that means nothing on SotF: TV. It’s possible to assume a lot of these early game players are going for the 10 Kills.


With the mention of Holly, another important topic has just come to mind; team desertion. Yes, only one color will survive to the finale, but behind the bandannas are friends, and potentially allies. Every game without fail we seem players making alliances, some temporary, and some right up until the final bullet, even though there can be only one survivor. I’ll be blunt; those bandannas mean shit to the players at present. Alliances are still being formed based on friendships, and that won’t stop. Brenda Hernandez has managed to create a shaky alliance between members of the Brown, Red and Gold team, with minimal shouting and minimal paranoia. (Although John Benson has potentially spoiled Gold Teams chances with this alliance, given his recent actions.) Elsewhere Madelyn Connor and Mikaela Warner have done the same, the sole reasoning being THEY KNOW EACH OTHER. This isn’t a game breaker; the teams will eventually come into play, especially later on as alliances fall apart. At the moment teams are scattered and for the most part unknown. Some players are instantly buying into the team dynamic, but two schools are competing, remember that. Madelyn and Mikaela’s reasoning makes a whole lot more sense when you consider that half the kids out there come from Detroit, complete unknowns to them. A shaky alliance, yes. But understandable. I know if I was in SotF, I’d want a friend at my back, even if one of us were ultimately going down in the end. Trust is a big thing in SotF, and the divide behind the schools has kept many players searching for friends first, over team-mates.


Will all these school alliances stand strong as the game continues? We can’t be sure. The idea of four other people who are depending on you and your cooperation is one that is sure to weigh heavy on Holly’s shoulders, even now as she ditches her fellow Black Team members. For the moment however, they’ll have to live with the handicap. In a similar vein is Tristan Hart, sure to make the rest of his team’s blood boil before too long. Unbeknownst to him, Grey Team had a single gun, now currently residing at the bottom of the tar pits. How will they take it, when they find out Tristan has thrown away their best chance at survival? Tristan may not have deserted his team, but he might as well have. These handicaps could prove to be game changing, and have thrown Black Team and Grey Team to the back of the pack for now. I can’t help but wonder how will the mentors react, their team members making alliances with friends over team-mates?


It’s still a little too early to say. I’m sure all the mentors are watching their teams’ actions carefully, and have been preparing for every situation. Now, I’ve been lurking the boards and hearing that many people are dissatisfied with the slow start. Sure, it may appear that way at first glance. But if you stop a moment to look a little deeper, you’ll see what a treat we’re in for. Expect big payoffs in the days to come.